TITLE:  “Untold Love”
AUTHORS:  Anne R. and Pat Steiner
SUMMARY:  What if there was more to Jagathon than we got to see.  What if Harm 
and Mac had The Talk then.  What if they’ve actually been together since that time.  
How would the season have played out; and more important, how would it end.
DISCLAIMER:  JAG belongs to CBS, Paramount et al.  No infringement of copyright 
is intended with this work of entertainment.
FEEDBACK:  Never demanded, but a note of enjoyment is always appreciated.  
Negative feedback is not.  We respect your right to not wish to partake of our work, 
please respect our request not to share that fact with us.

DEDICATION:  To Claudia and Mary Ann who insisted this story had to be written.  If 
their vision comes true, they are more psychic than Mac!!
*******************************

 ABOARD THE USS SEAHAWK
 21 May 2002
 
 "Commander Rabb?"
 
 Harm swung around at the sound of his name and his breath caught in his throat 
when he saw the young medic. It was too soon for news.  If he was being 
summoned, then the news could not be good.  
 
 The young woman smiled gently, reading his thoughts.  "Sir no relax.  She's hanging 
on.  Uh. . .sir the doctor wanted me to give this to you.  He said you'd know what to 
do with it."
 
 Harm reached his hand out, taking the chain that dangled from her fingers and 
fingering the circle of gold which was attached.  "Yeah I know exactly what to do with 
it.  I just hope I get the chance."
 
 >>>>>14 Oct 01
 An unusually warm Saturday.  Autumn in D.C.  The trees were just beginning to turn, 
but the sun provided summer.  Exhausted and sweating profusely Harm crossed the 
finish line along with Mac.  He looked to her and gave her a defeated smile.  It was 
over.  All that remained was a graceful exit.  He could go home to a cold shower and 
an even colder beer.  And with any luck he would wake up Monday with orders to 
assume a new identity.
 
 Mac walked a few feet away from the finish line, taking with her a bottle of water and 
leaning down to catch her breath.  Harm followed suit, himself still panting hard and 
he took a long drink, keeping his eyes averted from hers.
 
 To his surprise, she looked up and smiled gently.  "Why didn't you tell me about 
Renee?"
 
 A bolt of pain went through him.  He had handled that whole thing so badly.  "Hell I 
don't know Mac.  It occurred to late to mean anything?"
 
 Her look told him that did not help.  "In English please."
 
 "I couldn't."
 
 "She broke up with you."
 
 He shook his head, his breathing just beginning to ease.  "It's been over for awhile."
 
 "I'm sorry."  There was nothing else she could say, and she could not determine how 
distressed he might be.
 
 "So am I."  He took a long breath and added hastily.  "Sorry I couldn't tell you."
 
 "Were you afraid you'd look foolish?"
 
 Her gentle tone sent a wave of regret through him.  He had handled it all so badly.  
"Maybe.  I don't know."
 
 She paused a beat and when she spoke again, she sought his face, wanting to read 
his reaction.   "I don't know why we couldn't work things out between us Harm."
 
 His heart beat even faster than it was but this time not from near collapse.  She 
sounded like she was regretful.
 
 He was even more hopeful when she added, "So where does that leave us?"
 
 At that point his heart thudded.  She was leaving it up to him.  Him who had already 
messed up so badly.  Did she not know that was a bad idea?  At that point all he 
knew was that he wanted no more conflict with her, and if an attempt to further their 
relationship, to draw them closer, was only going to result in more hurt then he was 
ready to let it go.  He would rather have her as a friend and nothing more than to not 
have her in his life.
 
 With a start he realized she was waiting for his answer.  Waiting as she had in the 
past.  "I don't know Mac, at the end I guess," he finally got out, the defeat and 
surrender in his tone obvious.
 
 He had no sooner got the words out when she made a counter-proposal.  "How 
about at the beginning?"
 
 The smile with which he responded said it all.  It was not over, not lost.  They would 
have another chance.  Life was good.
 
 For the next half hour they stayed around the park, and when Mac finally excused 
herself Harm offered to walk her to her car.
 
 "Harm what is with you?" she demanded once they were at the 'Vette.  "You're 
acting like something's on your mind but you've had plenty of chance to share and 
you haven't.  Is there something else we need to say?"
 
 Another question.  Another spot.  "No there's something I need to ask you," he 
managed, willing a calmness into his voice he did not feel inwardly.  "Can we have 
dinner?"
 
 "I'm sorry?"  She was surprised by his question as well as his choice of words.
 
 "Please come over for dinner. I'll cook, we'll eat, we'll talk, maybe take a walk in the 
park?"
 
 "Harm have you had a heat stroke there?" she frowned.  "Listen to yourself.  You're 
asking me out."
 
 "Yeah that's what I'm doing," he grinned, feeling a small measure of his self-
confidence returning.  "The beginning remember.   The beginning of 'us'.  I'm asking 
you out."
  
  "You're serious?"
  
  "Yes I am. So what do you say?"
  
  "I guess I'll say yes" she smiled softly. "You surprised me sailor. I didn't 
  expect this from you yet."
  
  "Don't you think we've wasted enough time since May?" he asked. "And seeing 
  as how we never got to finish either of those talks we started, now might be 
  a good time."
  
  "We're going to talk too? As in a serious conversation?"
  
  "If one of us doesn't run away this time," he said quietly.
  
  "I wasn't running. I was just trying to get my head straight."
  
  "I know. And I'm sorry. That just came out wrong. I'm pretty good at that 
  recently aren't I?"
  
  "Well that's something we'll have to work on" Mac smiled.
  
  "So you'll still have dinner with me?" he said hopefully. "Despite the fact 
  that I just stuck my foot in my big mouth."
  
  "Yes I'll have dinner with you. What time do you want me to come over?"
  
  *****************
  Harm's Apartment
  
  The knock at the door was a welcome sound and with a wide smile Harm hurried 
  to the door.
  
  "Hi" he said as he opened the door and let Mac in. "Right on time."
  
  "Smells wonderful in here" she said with a large sniff. "You've been busy 
  this afternoon haven't you?"
  
  "Just a little" he smiled. "Come on in. Can I get you something to drink?"
  
  "Water's fine" she said as she followed him into the kitchen. "So what did 
  Chef Rabb whip up tonight?"
  
  "Just a little chicken Alfredo" he smiled. "I hope that's okay."
  
  "Sounds and smells wonderful. And I'm impressed. I figured after you nearly 
  killed yourself today the best I'd get was a pizza from the shop down the 
  street."
  
  "Crossed my mind for about one second. But I since this we're back at the 
  beginning I wanted to get us off on the right foot this time. Maybe this 
  time it will work." His back was to her as he said the words as he grabbed a 
  water bottle from the fridge before finally turning to face her.
  
  "Careful Flyboy" she whispered as she took the bottle from him. "You're 
  getting pretty close to telling me how you feel."
  
  "I've been trying to do that since May" he said softly. "But somehow we kept 
  getting interrupted. Or the time was just never seemed right."
  
  "I know. And that's not all your fault."
  
  "I don’t blame you for taking the TAD Mac. I probably would have done the 
  same thing. I just wish you hadn't left without talking to me first."
  
  "Harm you know why I did" Mac whispered. "It was easier that way."
  
  He nodded. "I know. But do you know how many nights I sat here wishing I 
  could change the night Brumby left."
  
  "You did what you had to do," Mac said quietly. "Renee needed you."
  
  "Yes but so did you" he whispered. "And I let you go. And I shouldn't have."
  
  "Harm it's over now. I don't hate you for it so lets not go over that 
  again."
  
  "I know it's over. But I also know I hurt you that night and I want you to 
  know how sorry I am for that. You've been a part of my life longer than 
  Renee and when you needed me, I let you down."
  
  "Yes you did," she admitted. "But that's why I took the TAD Harm. And as 
  much as it hurt then, I realize now that you were doing what you thought was 
  right."
  
  "So you forgive me for that?" he whispered.
  
  "I do. It's in the past now Harm. Remember we're at the beginning again. 
  None of that matters anymore. All that matters is we try to rebuild what we 
  had before."
  
  "Is that what you want?" he asked hopefully.
  
  "Would I have offered to start at the beginning if it wasn't?" she smiled.
  
  "I guess not" he smiled as well. "Okay enough heavy talk for now. Dinner's 
  ready and I want us to enjoy it."
  
  "I agree. Can I help with anything?"
  
  "No I've got it" he assured her. "Just have a seat and I will take care of 
  everything."
  
  "Harm this is wonderful" she raved between bites a few minutes later. "I'd 
  forgotten how good of a cook you were."
  
  "I aim to please" he smiled. "And I'm just glad that you agreed to have 
  dinner with me. I've been trying for weeks now since you got back to figure 
  out how to ask you over. Course most of the time we've been arguing so it 
  never seemed like the right time."
  
  "I hope that part is behind us," she said quietly.
  
  "I think so" he nodded as he raised his wineglass full of water. "How about 
  a toast to starting over again at the beginning?"
  
  "To the beginning" Mac smiled as her glass gently touched his.
  
  "I like the sound of that," he sighed, taking a moment to appreciate the woman 
sitting across from him, how her hair sparkled in the candlelight, and how her pink 
cheeks glowed with health and beauty.
 
 "Flyboy I'd forgotten how you're as at home in the kitchen as the cockpit," she 
smiled, blushing under his gaze.  "You going to tell me there's dessert too?"
 
 "Strawberry cream cake--and no way I'm going to claim I made that.  I'm a cook, not 
a baker," he laughed.  "And I promised you a walk too.  It's cooling down nicely but 
there's still daylight."
 
 A half hour later found them walking to the park and as they reached the entrance 
he reached for her hand.  "This is OK right?" he asked, suddenly unsure.
 
 "It's very OK," she assured him quickly and in fact threaded her fingers with his.  He 
led her down a small path that opened suddenly to a creek, populated by a dozen 
ducks.  
 
 "Now you see what the bread was for," he laughed, helping her to sit on the top of a 
nearby picnic table and handing her a piece to throw. 
 
 "This is something you do often?  Feed ducks?" she questioned and when he 
shrugged she smiled and leaned her head against his arm.  "OK I'm seeing a whole 
new side to you I think."
 
 "Do you like what you see?"
 
 "Oh yeah," she smiled.  "Oh yeah very much."
 
 The shadows around them lengthened as the air cooled down and Harm's arm 
slipped around her shoulders as naturally as if it was a daily occurrence.
 
 "Sometimes it seems all so easy," he whispered.  
 
 "Yes it does," she agreed, reading his thoughts to the letter as she tilted her head up 
to his.  Their lips met a millisecond later, and for that time there was nothing else in 
the universe save the connection that was forming between them.
 
 "We can do this can't we?" he asked they parted, though they separated only 
enough to facilitate breathing.
 
 "This as in us?"
 
 "Yeah.  This as in us."
 
 "I think. . .I think we've started at the beginning of something that could be very 
wonderful and special," she said slowly, choosing her words carefully. "And if we're 
careful with it, it can grow into. . .well into whatever we want to make of it."
 
 "I do like the way you think Colonel," he sighed.  And another kiss sealed the 
commitment they had just made.
 
 "And what about the Admiral and JAG?"
 
 "What about them?" he murmured, nuzzling her neck gently.  "No reason they have 
to know anything right now.  This is us, our private us, and we don't have to share it.  
I mean we're not going to kiss during staff call."
 
 "For which I'm sure the Admiral is grateful," she giggled.
 ===============
    MAC's APARTMENT
 10 Days Later
 
 Jingo gave a low growl at the doorbell.  "You're right, it is late," Mac frowned, 
levering herself reluctantly from the sofa and from beneath the afghan that was 
keeping her warm on this chilly October night.  A quick peek through the peep hole 
and a wave of relief that it was just Harm went through her, until a few seconds later 
when she feared something had to be wrong to get him to drive back from Patuxent 
at this late hour.
 
 "Harm what?" she was yelping as soon as she got the door open.
 
 "Hi," he breathed.  "You weren't in bed were you?"  As he asked, his eyes roved over 
the dark blue silk pajamas she wore.
 
 "No just reading myself sleepy," she assured him, grabbing his arm and pulling him 
inside.  "Now what's wrong?"
 
 "I need coffee," he sighed, "and to talk to you.  Please."
 
 "Harm is this about us?  You're scaring me here."  She was not totally successful in 
keeping any notes of worry or neediness from her tone.
 
 Wordlessly he took her into his arms, tilting her head up to his and placing a long 
and gentle kiss on her lips.  "Does that answer you?" he finally panted.
 
 "OK yeah foolish question," she smiled, taking his hand and leading him to the 
fireplace.  "Sit and warm up and I'll make that coffee."
 
 Coffee in hand, she listened to his dilemma and finally shook her head.  "Harm tell 
me you didn't drive seventy-five miles to play what if."
 
 "No I came for bad coffee and to catch you in your pajamas," he smiled, feeling 
himself relax for the first time that day.  Just talking to her, being with her, made 
everything seem right again.
 
 "What you're thinking of revealing--don't," she said firmly, "it's a career-ender.  Don't 
do that to yourself.  Or to us.  Please."
 
 "Have you always been this annoying," he laughed.
 
 "Isn't that why you came?"
 
 "I know what you're saying.  There has to be away around it," he sighed, taking her 
hand and putting a small kiss in the palm.  "Look I need to get back and you need to 
get to bed."
 
 "You could stay. . . I mean you can sack out. . .I mean. . ." she stammered and he 
once again smiled and shook his head.  
 
 "Thanks, but if I do that I won't want to get up and make that drive in the killer traffic.  
I'm going to get out of your hair now.  Thank you for this.  I needed to see you.  
Needed to hear your words of wisdom, needed you to tell me to stop thinking of 
doing something stupid."
 
 "Oh hey I have no qualms about pointing out when you're being stupid," she teased, 
accepting his hand up to walk to the door.  The kiss that ensued left neither one 
doubting what the other was thinking.
 
 "I think I need to get away from here," he panted, "before an atom bomb couldn't get 
me out of your arms."
 
  
  JAG HQ's
  Two Weeks later
  
  "China?" Mac repeated as she followed Harm into his office, closing the door 
  behind her. "You're going to China?"
  
  "Unfortunately yes" he sighed. "The SecNav wants Admiral Boone and I to go 
  along with the delegation."
  
  "Lucky you" she said quietly.
  
  "Not really. I'd rather be here with you. You know the last few weeks have 
  been pretty nice."
  
  "Yeah they have haven't they?" she smiled as she looked up at him. "Who am I 
  going to get to cook me dinner and take me for a walk in the park?"
  
  "Hopefully no one" he said protectively. "Because I don't want anyone else 
  moving in on my girl."
  
  "So I'm your girl" she laughed. "As silly as that sounds, I like it."
  
  "Me too" he smiled. "You think anyone has any ideas about us yet?"
  
  "I saw Harriet watching us the other day. She might be getting some idea. 
  You know she doesn't miss anything. But otherwise I think we're safe."
  
  "Good then I can do this" he whispered as he pulled her into his arms, his 
  lips finding hers in a long kiss that left them both breathless. "God I'm 
  going to miss you" he whispered when they parted.
  
  "Not as much as I'm going to miss you" she sighed. "You sure you can't 
  smuggle me aboard with you?"
  
  "No. And I'm glad you're not going with me on this one."
  
  "And what's that supposed to mean?" she demanded.
  
  "It means I care about you and yes we're only going to China, but I don't 
  have fond memories of my other visit there and the last thing I'd want is 
  for something to happen to you."
  
  "Well I care about you too sailor" she said softly as she buried her head 
  against his chest again. "Promise me you'll stay out of trouble over there."
  
  "As long as I know I have you to come back too, you can count on that" he 
  whispered as he dropped a kiss on her forehead.
  
  "You've got me" she promised as she looked up at him with a smile.
  
  "And for that I'm eternally thankful to God" he said softly. "I wish we had 
  more time but I have to get going and the Admiral wanted me to run through 
  the Reed case with Sturgis before I go."
  
  "Understood" she said as she wrapped her arms around him for one last hug. 
  "You'll call me if you can?"
  
  "I'll try. Not promising anything but I'll see what I can do."
  
  "I can live with that. Good luck sailor. I'll see you soon."
  
  One last hug and kiss and they finally parted, Mac taking a deep breath 
  before opening the door and walking out of his office.
  
  "Mac is Harm still here?" Sturgis asked as he bounded out of his office. 
  "He's supposed to go over the Reed case with me."
  
  "Yeah he's there," she said with a forced smile. She didn't want anyone else 
  to know how much she didn't like the idea of Harm going to China. And she 
  didn't want anyone to know how much she was going to miss him.
  
  A half-hour later he stuck his head in her office.
  
  "I'm out of here. I'll see you in a few days."
  
  "Stay out of trouble Commander" she smiled, doing her best to act casual, 
  knowing the others would be watching.
  
  "Always" he grinned. "Bye Mac."
  
  "Bye Harm" she sighed as she watched him sprint to the elevator.
  
 JAG HQ
 3 Days Later
 
 "Commander Rabb is on the phone," Tiner called quietly to where Mac and Bud 
were standing in conversation.
 
 She felt her heart lurch and with supreme effort turned calmly to Tiner.  "Thanks.  I'll 
take it in my office."
 
 The young Petty Officer looked confused.  "Ma'am I'm sorry. . .he requested 
Lieutenant Roberts."
 
 "Oh of course, excuse me," Mac murmured.  "Bud you'd best go see what he wants.  
We can pick this up later."
 
 She walked back to her office, staring intently out of the window.  This was the first 
contact they had had from him and reasonable or no, it hurt that he had asked for 
Bud, despite her telling herself that it was mission-related.
 
 Ten minutes later Bud stood in her doorway.  "Ma'am, the commander wants to 
speak to you, and ma'am, this is odd. . .he said be sure you were in your office, 
which you are, so I guess. . .never mind.  Commander Rabb for you on three ma'am."
  
  "Thanks Bud" she said as she closed the door after him before hurrying to 
  her phone. "Harm?"
  
  "God have I missed you" he whispered at the sound of her voice.
  
  "Missed you too" she said softly. "Everything okay over there?"
  
  "Yeah so far. It's just slow going. How about you?"
  
  "I've got a glamorous case" she smiled into the phone. "Two midshipmen were 
  caught dueling in Rock Creek Park. Guess who gets to prosecute."
  
  "Sounds like fun" Harm laughed. "I'll trade you."
  
  "Not having fun with the Chinese?"
  
  "No. You know they're anything but up front with us."
  
  "Is that what you were talking to Bud about?"
  
  "Yeah. So tell me more about these dueling midshipmen."
  
  "Not much to tell but while I was negotiating with their counsel that 
  Academy midshipmen getting in trouble is nothing new."
  
  "Whatever Sturgis told you it isn't true" Harm laughed.
  
  "Fortunately for you he hasn't told me anything yet. But I'm sure there's 
  hours of entertainment there."
  
  "Yes but I'd rather you heard them from me" he said softly. "Like when we're 
  alone one night."
  
  "Is that going to be anytime soon?" she asked softly.
  
  "I hope. But I have to go. I'll talk to you soon. Be careful of those 
  dueling midshipmen."
  
  "You be careful too. And if you can, call me so I know when you're coming 
  back."
  
  "Will you be waiting at Andrews for me if I do?" he asked.
  
  "With arms wide open" she whispered. "I miss you sailor."
  
  "Miss you too. And I'll be imagining that hug until I can get the real 
  thing."
  
  "Me too" she sighed. "Take care Harm."
  
  "Bye Mac."
  
  *********************
  Two Days Later
  
  "Ma'am, the word I have is he and Admiral Boone will be arriving this 
  afternoon" Tiner informed Mac.
  
  "Thanks Tiner. I guess I'll see him then." She did her best to hide her 
  disappointment in front of the yeoman and hurried back to her office. She 
  hadn't heard from Harm and she'd hoped he'd call her to let her know he was 
  coming back. Of course there could be several reasons why he hadn't called 
  her but none of them made her feel any better. Her phone rang a second later 
  and she quickly reached for it.
  
  "Colonel Mackenzie."
  
  "Hey beautiful. You think you could meet your handsome sailor at Andrews in 
  a few hours."
  
  "My handsome sailor" she smiled. "Can you refresh me again as to who that 
  is?"
  
  "Tall, good looking guy who misses you more than you can imagine."
  
  "Ah that sailor. I don’t know. What's in it for me?"
  
  "Some time alone with that good looking sailor," Harm said softly. "So will 
  you be there?"
 
 "I'll be there," she said quietly, sure he could hear her heart pounding even with the 
distance between them, and adding mischievously, "now where am I going to find 
that good looking sailor?"
 
 "He'll be there, I promise," he whispered.  "Gotta run.  See you then."  High above 
the earth, the western US coastline just passing below them, Harm gave his father's 
oldest friend a sheepish smile.  
 
 "Did I say anything?" Boone smiled as well.  "But now that I've been invited, about 
damn time you found someone."
 
 "She's amazing Tom," he said softly, dropping his head back on the seat, still smiling 
at the thought of seeing her again.
 ==============
 "I see our envoys are due home in a couple hours."  AJ dropped into a chair next to 
her in the breakroom, unpeeling his sandwich.
 
 "Yes sir, I believe they are," she said casually, attempting to not choke on her soup.  
"In fact Harm called and I'll be picking him up."
 
 Three hours later she was standing on the tarmac when the transport set down.  
With supreme effort she remained in the background while they were greeted, not 
stepping forward until Harm began to stride toward the hangar, his eyes searching 
the people milling about, that she called his name.
 
 "Hey," he breathed, stopping to take in the sight of her.  "I have missed you."
 
 "Welcome home Commander.  Job well done," she said formally, stopping in front of 
him and holding out her hand.
 
 "Thank you Colonel it's good to be back on US soil," he grinned, taking her hand and 
then pulling her to him.  "A handshake is not going to do it Marine."  A long hug 
followed.  "It's good to see you.  I don't have to tell you that do I?"
 
 "No you don't.  It's great to see you," she managed, her voice muffled because of 
being smothered by his embrace.  Finally she stepped back from him.  "You look 
tired Sailor."
 
 "It's been a helluva week but it's over with now.  And seeing you is pretty 
rejuvenating.  How about some dinner?  You run me by my place and I'll clean up 
and then we can go to yours so you can do the same?"
 
 "Yes to dinner, but not to going out," she replied.  "You're not up for that.  I will take a 
rain check though.  In the meantime, I'll cook."
 
 "Oh that's gonna happen," he groaned.  "I'm back from a week of eating god knows 
what as it is."
 
 "Funny.  Real funny.  I mean I'll reheat.  The Georgetown Giant Food doesn't have 
an entire area of prepared food for nothing."
 
 His arm slipped around her, a smile of contentment across his face.  "It's good to be 
home Sarah."
 ====================
 "You do heat up good," he smiled, pulling her chair out and escorting her to the sofa.  
"And I'll be doing the clean up thank you."
 
 When he joined her on the sofa ten minutes later she was stretched out contentedly 
and he dropped heavily next to her.  "You're tired mister," she observed with a gentle 
smile.
 
 "Yeah I am.  Jet lag, bad food, tension of the situation, and missing you.  Missing 
you most of all."
 
 "Now there's a line."
 
 "Every syllable true," he countered, easily drawing her into his arms.
 
 "I've missed this.   And I missed you.  But I think we've established that.  We missed 
each other."
 
 "And I missed this," he went on, finding her mouth for a long serious kiss.
 ==============
 November turned into December and the approach of Christmas.  Evenings were 
spent together now, with good-byes growing more and more difficult as feelings 
between them deepened.  In the office they maintained protocol, keeping their 
dealings no less businesslike  and no one realized what was happening.
   
 
  **********
  "Mac, can your best friend become your boyfriend?" Chloe asked.
  
  "Sometimes" Mac said softly. "If you're lucky." Her mind drifted to the man 
  who had first been her best friend but was now so much more. She knew he'd 
  been assigned a case at the last minute by the Admiral and had hoped that 
  he'd at least have called her. Course he also knew Chloe was in town and 
  he'd wanted to give her time alone with her little sister.
  
  Before Chloe could reply there was a knock at the door and together they got 
  up to see who it was.
  
  "Merry Christmas" Harm smiled as Mac opened the door. "Lt. Colonel 
  Mackenzie, Chloe Madison, this is Petty Officer Coates. She's uh"
  
  "His prisoner" the young woman offered.
  
  "Cool" Chloe smiled.
  
  "Uh come in" Mac replied and Harm motioned for the Petty Officer to go in.
  
  "Cute PJ's" he whispered. "I like the silk better."
  
  She shot him a warning look and he turned his attention back to the business 
  at hand. "Would you mind looking after the Petty Officer just for tonight."
  
  "She really is your prisoner?" Mac asked and he nodded.
  
  "It's a long story. Do you mind?"
  
  "You'll owe me" she whispered.
  
  "I'll be happy to pay up when we're alone" he whispered.
 
  "I'm holding you to that" she said with a smile. "Petty Officer can I take 
  your coat?" she asked as she turned to her guest.
  
  "Thanks for doing this" he sighed as Mac handed him a cup of coffee. Chloe 
  and Jennifer were happily chatting away and he and Mac were taking advantage 
  of the time, even if they weren't alone.
  
  "No problem. I got a postcard from Mic today" she said casually.
  
  "Tell me he's not coming back" Harm said as he held his breath.
  
  "He's out to sea so I think you're safe" Mac smiled. "Not that you have any 
  reason to worry." Her hand tentatively reached for his and he gave it a 
  quick squeeze.
  
  "I got a postcard too" he smiled. "Renee's mother wanted to let me know that 
  Renee and the mortician were honeymooning in Maui."
  
  "Does that bother you?"
  
  "Hell no" he said quickly. "I'm glad she's happy with someone else."
  
  "Just checking" Mac grinned.
  
  "Thanks for doing this" Harm said as he stood up. "I uh have to meet 
  Sturgis."
  
  "Do I get a ride in that Vette when you finish it" Mac asked as she walked 
  him to the door.
  
  "Of course" he assured. "And I promise I'll make this up to you."
  
  "I'll be waiting" she smiled. "Good night Harm."
  
  "Night Mac"
  
  He wanted with all the world to take her into his arms but with Chloe and 
  Jennifer there he couldn't. Their eyes met and she knew exactly what he was 
  thinking and she ran a gentle hand over his arm.
  
  "See you tomorrow sailor" she whispered. "You'll be at the party right?"
  
  "Of course" he assured her. "I wish there were some way we could go 
  together."
  
  "Too suspicious" Mac said softly. "So far we've done a good job of keeping 
  this quiet."
  
  "I know" he sighed. "I'll see you then."
  *****************
  Roberts Household
  24 Hours later
  
  "Merry Christmas Commander" Harriet smiled as she opened the door.
  
  "Merry Christmas. This is Petty Officer Coates."
  
  "It's Jennifer ma'am" she replied.
  
  He looked around for Mac, his breath catching when he finally spotted her. 
  She looked more beautiful that ever and as she made her way over to him he 
  felt his heart pounding.
  
  "Hey Harm" she said casually for the benefit of those around them.
  
  "Mac," he greeted her evenly.  His eyes however were sending a message to her a 
mile a minute.
 
 "You look nice too," she smiled, reading his thoughts and dipping him a cup of punch 
at the same time.  "I think Big Bud has something a little stronger over there."
 
 "This will do me just fine," he assured her, holding his cup toward hers.  "Merry 
Christmas Sarah."
 
 "Merry Christmas Harm," and for a moment as their cups touched, it was as if they 
were the only people in the room.
 
 "Can I get you two a room?" Singer groaned, stepping between them to fill her cup.
 
 Mac's mouth dropped open in surprise but Harm simply smiled that winning smile of 
his.  "No thanks Lieutenant we're fine here.  Another time maybe."  With that he took 
Mac's arm and led her away, leaving one astonished Lieutenant in their wake.
 
 "I don't believe you said that," Mac all but giggled when they had retreated to a quiet 
corner.  
 
 "Oh it will give her something to stew on," he laughed.  "And if she's thinking about 
us, she's leaving some other poor souls alone."
 
 "Yeah I guess, but someday she's going to cross the wrong person," she sighed, 
"and change of subject.  I'm looking forward to church."
 
 "Yeah I am too.  Sit with me?"
 
 "Sorry Sailor.  My dance card is full."
 
 It took him a full second to realize she was teasing.  "There's something else I want. 
. .I wish. . . I'd like. . ." he stammered and she looked at him quizzically.
 
 "Hey if it's made you speechless, it must be important," she smiled, putting a gentle 
hand on his arm.  "Spit it out Mister."
 
 "I would like you to. . ." he began, only to be stopped by his cell phone's ringing and 
with a nod to Mac he walked away to answer it, returning a minute later.  "Hey 
they've found my corvette," he yelped.  "Want me to come down and see about it.  I 
won't be long OK?"
 
 "I could come."
 
 "No you stay here where it's warm.  It's freezing out there," he told her firmly.  "I'll 
make sure I'm back before church."
 
 "Be careful," she urged, her hand on his arm and with the party in full swing, 
managed to sneak a quick kiss to his cheek..
 
 It was a full hour later when he returned, and despite the fact Mac was speaking with 
AJ and Harriet, he managed to catch her eye at once.  "It wasn't mine," he mouthed.
 
 "I'm sorry, but we have another problem. . ." she started, only to see Jennifer step 
from behind Harm.  "OK never mind.  Welcome back Petty Officer."
 
  "Commander is everything all right?" Harriet asked.
  
  "Fine. The Petty Officer just needed a long walk to clear her head," he said 
  as he walked over to Singer. "Lt., about the bracelet" he started.
  
  "Sir, AJ took it from the bathroom. We found it behind the dresser."
  
  "I was wrong about you" Singer said as she looked at Jennifer.
  
  "You were quick to judge ma'am"
  
  "And you were quick to run."
  
  "So where does that leave us?" Jennifer asked.
  
  "I'll forget about the bracelet and the walk around the block. But I won't 
  dismiss the UA and the resisting."
  
  "That would be too much to hope for wouldn't it" Jennifer smiled.
  
  "Come on we don’t want to be late" Harriet called and everyone started out 
  of the apartment.
  
  "Here let me help you with that" Harm said as he hurried to help Mac into 
  her coat, everyone else now gone.
  
  "Thanks" she smiled. For a moment they stood there before Mac looked up at 
  the mistletoe. "Uh oh. Awkward moment number 310."
  
  He just smiled before his lips met hers.
  
  "You didn't think I was going to pass up the chance to do that did you?" he 
  whispered. "I've wanted to do that since I walked in and saw you. You look 
  incredible."
  
  "Not so bad yourself sailor" she smiled. "Hey you were going to ask me 
  something before. What was it?"
  
  "I uh was wondering if you'd go to the Wall with me tonight" he said 
  quietly. "I was planning on going after the services."
  
  "You want me to come with you?" she whispered. "Are you sure?"
  
  "It would mean a lot to me if you did."
  
  "I'd be honored," she said softly. "We'd better go before they think we got 
  lost."
  
  ************
  Chaplain Turner's service brought tears to both their eyes and Mac resisted 
  the urge to reach for Harm's hand. She was suddenly glad he had asked her to 
  go with him to the Wall, knowing how hard this night was for him.
  
  "You okay?" she whispered as they filed out of the church.
  
  "Yeah I'm okay," he said with a forced smile.
  
  "Harm look" Mac said as she pointed to the red corvette.
  
  "Sturgis you found it" Harm said happily.
  
  "Found it?"
  
  "You stole my vette?"
  
  "I took it to get the new top put on."
  
  "Sturgis" Harm groaned before giving his friend a hug. "Thanks."
  
  "Merry Christmas Buddy" Sturgis smiled.
  
  "Harm we wont all fit" Mac smiled.
  
  "Well I'll have to come by tomorrow and give you all rides" he grinned. "You 
  all right?" he asked as he looked at Jennifer.
  
  "Yeah I'll be fine. Colonel Mackenzie is taking me home with her."
  
  "I know" Harm nodded.
  
  "We uh have to make a small stop before we go home" Mac said sheepishly her 
  gaze staying on Harm.
  
  "I understand ma'am" Jennifer smiled as she looked at the two. "And I 
  promise to stay out of the way."
  
  "Keep that to yourself Petty Officer" Mac whispered to the young woman.
  
  "I will ma'am" she smiled.
  
  ***********
  "Thank you for doing this" Harm said softly as he and Mac walked hand and 
  hand to the Wall.
  
  "No where else I'd rather be than with you" she smiled as she looked back at 
  the car where Jennifer waited. "You think she'll keep our secret?"
  
  "I think so. She seems like a good kid. Just a little mixed up."
  
  "Well you've done a lot for her and I hope she gets her life straightened up 
  now" Mac said quietly.
  
  He stopped as they reached the panel of the wall where the name of Harmon 
  Rabb Sr. was etched.
  
  "You want some time alone?" she asked as she squeezed his hand.
  
  "No please stay with me. I want him to meet the person who means the most to 
  me."
   
 "I'd be most honored," she smiled with a long sigh of happiness.  "Harm what's. . ."
 
 On top of the panel was a card and he turned to Mac.  "I. . . I don't know.  Harmon 
Rabb Senior and to the father I never knew it says."
 
 Mac looked over his shoulder, her hand automatically reaching out to touch the 
slightly indented letters.
 
 "Now we're all here."  A Russian accented voice from the other side of Harm and 
both swung around, Harm's arm instinctively going in front of Mac in protective mode 
until a second later he broke into a broad smile.  "Sergei."
 
 "Hello my brother." A long hug ensued while Mac stood behind Harm, smiling softly.  
Something he had prayed for often in the previous year had been granted.  His 
brother was safe.
 
 Before she could react further, she found herself in Harm's celebratory embrace.  
 
 "Hello Colonel Mackenzie," Sergei said softly.  "It is good to see you once again."
 
 "You too Sergei.  This man has been pretty worried about you."
 
 Sergei nodded and watched them for a second, taking note that they were still 
clinging together.   "My brother has found the woman who completes him."
 
 "Well put Sergei." 
 
 "Clay?" Harm gasped, beginning to understand.
 
 "Sergeant Zhukov and I have been on the road for eighteen hours," he sighed.  
"Merry Christmas Harm."
 
 "Merry Christmas Clay," he breathed, shaking his hand, his other arm still around 
Mac.  "By the way what this looks like. . ."
 
 "It's not my business," Clay shrugged.
 
 "I was just going to say, it's not for public consumption right now please."
 
 Clay gave him a two fingered mock salute and ambled away, Sergei's call of "Mr. 
Webb," and Clay's answering thank you echoed above the otherwise silent 
atmosphere surrounding the wall.
 
 "I don't believe you are here," Harm gasped and hugged his brother once more, and 
was even more started when he looked at Mac and found tears glistening on her 
cheeks.  "Sergei, and dad, this is Sarah.  And she's a part of my life now.  A very 
important part."

 
  *************
  Three Weeks Later
  
  "I hate this" Mac whispered as she clung to Harm. "I hate you having to go 
  away all the time."
  
  "I know and hopefully it won't be long" he sighed. "But we knew stuff would 
  happen and we wouldn't always get to work together. And just be glad I got a 
  late flight so you could bring me here so we could have a proper goodbye."
  
  "Why couldn't Sturgis go to the Henry instead of you?"
  
  "You know why. And trust me I'd rather be here with you than going out 
  there."
  
  "Liar" she smiled. "You love going to the carriers and you know it."
  
  "Yeah well I'm going to miss my goodnight hug and kiss," he said softly.
  
  "Me too" she sighed.
  
  "I'll be back before you know it," he said as he drew her into his arms. He 
  held her tightly before their lips met in a long and passionate kiss.
  
  "Keep doing that and I won't leave" Harm whispered when they parted.
  
  "You have to" she said softly.
 
  "I know" he nodded. "But when I come back, I promise you and I are going to 
  have some alone time."
  
  "You sending Sergei away for the weekend?"
  
  "No we're going away," he said seriously. "Just you and I. Maybe a little 
  cottage on the beach somewhere."
  
  "One or two beds?" she asked softly.
  
  "One" he smiled. "And on that note, I'd better go. I'll see you soon."
  
  "I'm holding you to that weekend away" she whispered as she finally let go 
  of him. "Just you and me."
  
  "Just you and me" he promised. "Bye Sarah."
  
  "Bye Harm" she whispered.
  
  ********
  JAG HQ's
  Next Morning
  
  A sleepless night filled with nightmares had done nothing for her frame of 
  mind and it was a tired and slightly irritable Sarah Mackenzie that reported 
  for work the next morning.
  
  "You look a little tired today Colonel" Sturgis commented. "You okay?"
  
  "Uh, had a rough night. Weird dream." Of course having Harm thousands of 
  miles away had something to do with that rough night. She'd hoped he'd 
  called her when he got there but there was no word from him. Her nightmare 
  had just unsettled her more.
  
  Her mood didn’t improve when their expert on the Nuclear weapons deal they 
  were working on with the Russian Navy didn’t show up.
  
  "Where is she?" Mac sighed as she paced the conference room.
  
  "I'm sure she's got a good reason for being late" Sturgis replied.
  
  "Well she's been early every other time we've met with her. And it's already 
  11:18."
  
  "How do you do that?"
  
  "Do what?" Mac asked.
  
  "Know the precise time without looking at your watch?"
  
  "Internal clock I guess" Mac shrugged. "I'm going to try her cell again." 
  She reached for her phone, knocking over her cup of coffee. She quickly 
  reached for a towel to stop the flowing liquid, but not before it reached 
  Commander Aiken's folder. As she glanced at the picture of the woman, scenes 
  from her nightmare suddenly ran through her head.
  
  "Come on" she said as she stood up.
  
  "Where are we going?" Sturgis asked.
  
  "To her place."
  
  ***********
  
  A long two hours later she stood in the park watching as the body of 
  Commander Lara Aiken was brought up by the DC police department.
  Her cell phone rang and with a sigh she stepped away from the commotion to 
  answer it.
  
  "Colonel Mackenzie" she said quietly.
  
  "Mac what's wrong?" Harm's voice, soft and caring.
  
  "Harm" she whispered. "You have no idea how glad I am to hear your voice.
  
  "Honey what's wrong?"
  
  "Our contact on the Russian Arms agreement was murdered" she said quietly. 
  "I'm at the park where they found her body."
 
 "Mac tell me you're not alone there," he gasped, and she pictured him running his 
hand through his hair.
 
 "Oh no I'm with Sturgis and the DC police are here," she sighed.  "I just had to hear 
your voice that's all.  It's pretty awful, and I've been having nightmares besides.   Not 
just nightmares, visions is more like it, and it's making me crazy.  Worse it's making 
Sturgis crazy and I'm sure he's making notes for his recommendation for my psyche 
eval.  So I just had to hear your voice."
 
 "Do you need me to come home?"
 
 "Oh yeah, that would be what you should do all right," she muttered.  "Excuse me 
sir, my partner back at JAG is losing her marbles and I need to go home to her."
 
 "You can scoff, but if I thought you really did need me, then I'd be there in a 
heartbeat," he declared, now pacing back and forth in his anxiety.
 
 "Harm no really, I'm OK," she assured him quickly.  "You're on an assignment.  
Honest I just wanted to hear your voice.  I miss you so much.  And this case is gotten 
to me admittedly."
 
 "OK.  You hang on now.  I know you can do it.  But if things get beyond you I'm 
expecting you to call me. One more thing, when I get back, as soon as we can get 
some leave, I want you to come out to LaJolla and met my mom and Frank."
 
 "That's supposed to relax me?" she gasped.
 
 "Mom already knows you from my talking about you constantly,  and I know a place 
we can get a great cottage in a secluded part of the coast."
 
 She smiled at the thought of him discussing her with his mother, and even more so 
at the thought of going away with him to someplace romantic.  "OK that sounds great.  
Really it does and Sturgis is jumping up and down and making faces so I'm going to 
go."  She turned her back on her current partner, cupping her palm over the phone.  
"I love you Harmon Rabb," she added in a bare whisper.
 
 A whisper not unheard across the miles that separated them and his body ached for 
her.
 
 As did hers as she put away the phone.  Her longing for him to be at her side was 
intense, and it took Sturgis's grabbing of her arm to get her attention.
 
 "You and I need to talk," he told her firmly, adding in a more conciliatory tone, 
"please.  We're going to be working together and I hope we're going to be friends and 
there's something I'd like to discuss with you--get off my chest so to speak."
 
 "Sure, come to my office after we get back," she nodded.
 
 The day went from bad to intolerable as the visions Mac was having about this case 
increased, and all efforts to explain to Sturgis fell on deaf ears as his impatience 
grew.  By the time they returned to JAG, the words between them had grown tense 
and she fled to her office, as he did to his.
 
 A short time later, Harm returned his desperate call.  "Buddy I need your help," he 
screeched into the phone.
 
 "Name it."
  
 "How do you deal with her?"  
 
 Sturgis did not have to identify the 'her' for Harm, who chuckled slightly at the other 
end of the connection.
 
 "Use a firm hand," he laughed.
 
 "Are you screwin' with me?  Harm I'm desperate here."
 
 "OK, sorry.  What did Mac do?" Harm asked patiently, prepared to hear a litany of 
complaints.  
 
 "She's having visions.  She's trying to solve the case with them."
 
 "Is it working?"
 
 Harm's passive tone began to irritate him and Sturgis raised his voice.  "It's making 
me crazy.  She's immune to logic and reason."
 
 "Try agreeing with her.  It throws her offstride."  That same patient 'I don't see the 
problem' tone and Sturgis gritted his teeth.
 
 "Come to think of it, why am I asking you.  You don't have any more luck than I do."
 
 It was then that Harm heard the desperation in his voice, and he remembered Mac's 
words of earlier.  Prickles of concern nagged at him now, and a strong sense of 
protectiveness began to sweep over him.  "Hey Sturgis, she saved my life with those 
visions.  You can't get any luckier than that.  I want you to do something for me.  
Please.  Try to have some patience with this.  I suspect she's as upset as you are."
 
 "Doubtful."
 
 "Please I'm asking as a friend.  She means a lot to me you know."
 
 "If you say so.  You and her--that's a whole other ballgame."
 
 "Sturgis I'm serious here now.  I don't want her hurt, not even by you.  Lighten up.  
For me--as a friend, please."
 
 "OK I'll try counselor.  That's the best you're going to get."  He hung up the phone 
and with a long sigh of pent up frustration walked to Mac's office.  
 
 "You think we could talk now?  I probably owe you an apology for some of what I 
said earlier."

   "I'm good at making you do that" Mac sighed.
 
 "Look, I never feel like I'm on solid ground with you Colonel."
 
 "That’s because my life is an earthquake Commander" Mac smiled. "Have a seat 
 please. You see I think we make a good team. You're a little cerebral and 
 detail oriented and I'm neither of them so it kind of works in a Laurel & 
 Hardy sort of way."
 
 "Ohh Ohh" Sturgis smiled with his best Laurel imitation.
 
 "Oh so I'm the fat one."
 
 "You know what this is your problem. You don't do this any better with 
 Harm."
 
 "No that's different," Mac said quickly.
 
 "There seems to be a certain tension with you two."
 
 "Some"
 
 "A lot."
 
 "You're missing the point Sturgis."
 
 "Come on Mac."
 
 "I never slept with him." The words slipped out before she could stop them 
 and she inwardly groaned at herself.
 
 "Is that the problem?"
 
 "There is no problem," Mac said as she stood up and walked to the door.
 
 "Then get over it and move it."
 
 "It won't work" Mac admitted as she closed the door. "I'm in love with him." 
 At once she froze, realizing she'd just admitted something to Sturgis 
 something that she'd just come to realize herself. Something that she and 
 Harm hadn't even talked about yet.
 
 Sturgis said nothing and she sat down next to him. "You have to keep this to 
 yourself" she said quietly.
 
 "Okay."
 
 "I'm serious Sturgis."
 
 "So am I."
 
 ***********
 "Welcome back sailor" Mac said softly as she greeted Harm at Andrews. His 
 investigation aboard the Henry was over as was Commander Aiken's murder 
 investigation and she was hoping they could find some time to be together to 
 talk.
 
 "Glad to be back" he sighed as he wrapped his arms around her. "I missed 
 you. Everything okay?"
 
 "Yeah fine" she smiled. "Better now that you're back."
 
 "Okay Marine. What's going on? I know when something is wrong."
 
 "Nothing" she said as she looked away.
 
 "Is this about those three words you whispered the other day," Harm said 
 softly. "Because if it is, then I need to say this first. I love you too 
 Sarah Mackenzie."
 
 "You do?" she whispered.
 
 "More than I could have ever imagined" he smiled before his lips found hers 
 in long kiss. "Is that clear enough" he whispered when they parted.
 
 "Crystal" she smiled.
 
 "And I'm serious about that time away for us" Harm said softly. "Just you 
 and me in that beach cottage."
 
 ****************
 "Cancel that beach cottage" Mac murmured as she walked into Harm's office 
 closing the door behind her. "I've offered to help the Admiral with his 
 defense."
 
 "Well at least he wanted your help" Harm sighed. "And I've been assigned Lt. 
 Teague's defense so we wouldn't be able to go anyway."
 
 "One day" she said with a small smile.
 
 "One day" he whispered as he pulled herself into his arms, allowing them a 
 rare moment together at the office. "I love you Sarah. Don't forget that."
 
 "I love you too" Mac sighed as she enjoyed the comfort of his arms for the 
 moment. "And I'd better get going if I'm going to come up with a defense for 
 the Admiral."
 
 For the next few week they rarely saw each other, Harm busy with Lt. 
 Teague's court martial while Mac handled the Admiral's Mast. There was 
 little time for anything besides a quick dinner together before Mac had to 
 turn her attention back to the Admiral's Mast, which was going anything but 
 well.

It was finally done.  Admiral's Mast was settled to everyone's satisfaction, if not 
delight, and the Teague matter was laid to rest as well. 

"You better start packing Flyboy," Mac announced as she came into Harm's office 
and flopped onto the nearest chair.

"Huh?"  He barely looked up from his computer until her words registered.  "Packing?  
You mean it?  You asked?"

"I told you I was going to," she gloated.  "You should have more faith in me.  I told 
you I was going to ask, and of course since right now I'm totally on his good side, he 
let me."  She waved two sheets of paper in his face.  "Ten days.  Count them.  Ten 
long days of California sun."

"I hope you have a wonderful time."

"Ass," she yelped and punched his arm muscle.  "You better call your mother and tell 
her we're on our way.  I got us two seats to LAX and from there I'm assuming you 
know the way."

His eyes opened as wide as they could and he grabbed for the phone.  "Marine you 
do good work."

"I've been telling you that for years," she grinned.
=========================
LA JOLLA
10 Long Hours later      

"Harm, Sarah welcome," Trish called from the top of the steps that led up to the stone 
house.   "This is so last minute, and I'm so glad you're here."

"Yes ma'am and I hope that's OK," Mac sighed.  "I swear if we had stayed there for 
the start of another work day we would have gotten other assignments.  Our C.O. 
was in a good mood and we ran."

"Nonsense come in.  Harm you're looking a little chunky.  Life must be agreeing with 
you."

"Yes ma'am," Harm grinned.  "Note to self--lose twenty pounds."

"Not while you're here," she chided him.  "You come on now.  I have a late supper 
keeping warm for you.  I'm sure they didn't feed you on the plane and I bet you didn't 
stop on the way down."

"No ma'am and it smells wonderful thank you," Mac smiled.

"Mom where's Frank?" Harm asked as they walked to the family dining room.

"Dallas for four days," she sighed.  "But he said to be sure and not let you leave 
before he saw you.  Harm he thinks so highly of you."

"Yeah Mom.  I do of him too.  Even if I didn't always show it."

"You were a brat weren't you?" Mac giggled.

"I was an ass to the man a lot of the time as a teenager," he admitted.  "But I never 
would have found out what happened to Dad without him. . .or without you."  With 
that he squeezed her hand hard and she squeezed back, neither of them moving 
their hands away from the other.

An hour passed in pleasant talk and Mac finally felt herself about to fall asleep at the 
table.  "This has been great Mrs. Burnett but I truly do need to go to bed.  Would you 
excuse me?"

"Oh honey of course.  Harm I had the guest suite fixed up.  The one with the two 
bedrooms.  And I don't even want to know."

"Yes ma'am," Harm grinned.  "I'll walk her upstairs and come back and say good 
night."

"Well what's it going to be?" he asked gently when he opened the door to the suite.  
"A couple weeks ago we talked about the cottage and one bed or two.  Well the 
cottage just has one, and they're expecting us tomorrow, but for tonight?"

"For tonight I'm too tired but to enjoy being here with you," she smiled.  "And I'm 
going to fall into that bed right there.  You are welcome to share if you want when you 
come back up.  But I think the cottage sounds more like the stuff fantasies are made 
of.  We can wait one more night."
==============
"Mrs. Burnett, good morning," Mac smiled.  "That coffee smells wonderful.  I'm glad to 
see I'm not the only early riser."

"Sarah good morning.  Please join me.  Did you sleep well?"

"Yes ma'am thank you.  First really good night's sleep in a long time.  No JAG to be 
concerned about."  She bit back the words that would have followed 'and a certain 
man holding me'.

"You want to tell me how 'together' you and my son are," Trish smiled, pouring coffee 
for her guest.

"We're trying real hard," she sighed.  "And this time we think we're getting it right."

"You're much more suited to him than that Renee woman was," Trish laughed lightly.  
"And that's the last I want to say on that subject."

"Well I was with my own male version of Renee for most of that time," she admitted.  
"Both of us with people we did not really love, keeping our feelings for each other 
hidden."

"Not good," Trish admonished.  "Harm was pretty miserable."

"You could have fooled me," she laughed.  "Man looked pretty contented most 
mornings."

 "Talking about me" Harm yawned as he walked into the kitchen.
 
 "Never" Mac grinned.
 
 "Yeah right" he scoffed as he sat down. "What has Mom been telling you?"
 
 "Nothing I didn't already know" she smiled.
 
 They spent the day on the beach, alternating between spending time lounging 
 in the sand and playing in the ocean.
 
 "Wonderful idea sailor" Mac sighed happily as they lay on the sand following 
 another dip in the ocean. "This is heaven."
 
 "Thought you might like it" he smiled as he leaned over and placed a gentle 
 kiss on her lips. "And we deserve it after the past few weeks."
 
 "Yes we do. I'm so glad all that stuff with the Admiral is over."
 
 "Me too. You think anyone thought it was strange that we were taking off at 
 the same time."
 
 "I covered my tracks pretty well" Mac smiled. "Everyone thinks I went up to 
 see Chloe."
 
 "What if she calls looking for you?"
 
 "I told her I was out of town on assignment for the next ten days. So we're 
 safe."
 
 "You think of everything Marine" he smiled as he looked over at her. 
 "Brilliant and beautiful. That's why I love you."
 
 ************
 "Thanks Mom" Harm said as he hugged Trish. "We may stop back on our way 
 home."
 
 "Please do if you can" Trish smiled as she let him go. "Mac, I'm so glad I 
 finally got to meet you."
 
 "Me too" Mac smiled. "And I promise we won't be strangers."
 
 "Good. I never get to see this guy enough as it is."
 
 "Mom" Harm groaned. "You know I come when I can."
 
 "Yeah well it's not often enough for me."
 
 "I'll see what I can do about that" Mac promised.
 
 A short time later he pulled the rental car up next to the small ocean 
 cottage and Mac smiled as they walked hand in hand across the sand to the 
 door.

 "Our place for the next week" Harm smiled as he opened the door. "What do 
 you think?"
 
 "I love it" Mac sighed as she looked around the small cottage. There was a 
 tiny kitchen and a small living room and in the back, a bedroom with a large 
 king sized bed. "Thank you."
 
 "The sofa folds out in case you decide you'd rather have the bed to yourself 
 tonight" he said softly.
 
 "Not this trip sailor" she whispered as she pulled him into her arms, their 
 lips meeting in a long kiss that left them both breathless.
 
 "Sarah I don't want to wait any longer" he whispered.
 
 "We don't have to" she said softly.
 
 He lifted her into his arms and carried her to the bedroom, gently laying 
 her on the large bed. It didn't take long to dispose of their clothing and 
 moments later what they'd both dreamed for months finally happened. Their 
 love making was slow and gentle, both savoring the first time together. 
 Afterwards she lay contentedly in his arms as the late afternoon sun drenched 
 the room.
 
 "So did the gold wings live up to their reputation?" Harm whispered as he 
 kissed her forehead.
 
 "And then some" Mac smiled as she rolled over to face him. "Was it okay for 
 you?"
 
 "Better than I'd dreamed" he said softly as his hand gently stroked her 
 cheek. "And I've had many dreams about you and me."
 
 "You have?"
 
 "Yes I have" he smiled. "And now that you've made all my dreams come true, 
 I'll die a happy man."
 
 "Not for a long time sailor" Mac whispered. "You'd better never leave me."
 
 "Never" he whispered before his lips found hers again.
 ==============
22 Jan 02
JAG HQ

The week between California and now had been good.  Harm and Mac returned to 
D.C. committed to each other, much in love, and keeping all that to themselves for 
now.

"Harm congratulations on scoring for the Super Bowl.  Best seats in the house they 
say.," Sturgis boomed.

"Excuse me?  Seats?" Mac questioned.  "As in more than one?"   At the same time 
her thoughts were racing and she smiled slightly.  Sturgis had spoiled the surprise, a 
weekend in New Orleans.  Of course it was awfully close to the time they had just 
spent in California but she would take time away from D.C.--time with Harm--any day.
 
Harm looked surprised himself.  He had not taken into consideration what Mac would 
think when she heard them talking, and he had in fact planned to tell her himself.  "It's 
a last minute thing."

Playing the game she asked slyly, "Who are you going to take?"

AJ looked up.  "Yeah I'd like to hear that one myself."

Harm shook his head.  "Well That depends."

"On what?" Sturgis demanded.  "Tiner's been telling everyone about your good 
fortune.  Where are they on the 50 yard line?"

Harm looked more than slightly sheepish.  "Oh they're a little better than that."

"So who are you taking?"

Mac pierced him with a long look.  "You're cutting it a little close aren't you?"  In other 
words she would have liked a little notice.

"Don't look at me, I'm booked." AJ grinned and walked out.

Harm looked to Sturgis and smiled.  "Well when faced with a difficult decision I'm 
going to do what I always do--sleep on it."

"You're enjoying this way too much."

"Where are you going anyway?  You even going to be here?"

"TAD to New London."

"Sounds like a lot of work Sturgis.  Hope you don't get stuck watching the game in 
some torpedo room," Mac said mildly.

"Don't you worry Colonel.  I'll be back in time.  Harm I trust you won't be swayed by 
emotional appeals."

"You know me, when it comes to football I'm a careful man".

As he was saying that, Sturgis's eyes met Mac's and he gave her a half smile, 
conveying the message to be careful about revealing too much.  Little did he know 
she thought as she nodded to him.

"We'll talk tonight," Harm promised her, gesturing to the clock.  "Court."

 Moving along here!

Group Hug!
 
 
  They spent a long day in court and as always drove home separately to Mac's 
  place where Harm was now spending his nights. Sergei had been happy to 
  take over Harm's place and happy to keep their relationship a secret.
  
  "I hate going up against you in court" she sighed as she climbed out of her 
  vette.
  
  "Well it's in the member's hands now" Harm reminded her. "And you know what 
  happens in the court room stays in the court room. And now that we're alone 
  I can do this." He reached for her and pulled her to him, their lips meeting 
  in a long kiss.
  
  "Hello to you too" she whispered when they parted. "What was that for?"
  
  "So you don't kill me when you find out about the tickets" Harm said with a 
  small smile.
  
  "Why would I kill you" she smiled. "A weekend in New Orleans with you sounds 
  wonderful."
  
  "That's why you're going to kill me" he groaned.
  
  "I'm confused but I'm also hungry so let's take this upstairs and you can 
  explain this to me while you make dinner."
  
  "I make dinner?"
  
  "Well if I'm going to kill you, you might as well try and butter me up with 
  dinner first" she grinned.
  
  "Always thinking food" he said as he wrapped his arm around her.
  
  "So spill it Flyboy," she said as she dug into her chicken and rice. "How 
  did you get the tickets and why am I going to want to kill you."
  
  "Mac I don't have tickets for the Superbowl."
  
  "What do you mean? Tiner said you had the best seats in the house."
  
  "Let me correct that. I have the best seats above the house. Mac they asked 
  me to provide cover over the Superdome. I'll be flying."
  
  "Flying" she whispered.
  
  "Mac it's not a big deal" he said softly. "You know I helped out at Pax a 
  few months ago."
  
  "I know. It's just that whenever I think about you flying, I get scared. You 
  know I'll never forget that night as long as I live."
  
  "And neither will I" he whispered as he reached for her hand. "But I'm just 
  going to be flying over the Superdome for a few hours. The weather is going 
  to be nice so there's nothing for you to worry about."
  
  "You know I will" she sighed. "I can't help it. Comes with the territory of 
  loving you."
  
  "I know. But it'll be fine. And you're going to Bud and Harriet's for the 
  party so you won't even have to time to worry about it."
  
  "No I'll just spend the whole evening trying to pretend I'm not worried 
  about you" she sighed.
  
  "I'm sorry. I didn't know this would upset you this much."
  
  "I'm not upset. I just don’t want anything to happen to you."
  
  "Nothing will happen. Please don’t worry."
  
  "I won't. But I am really disappointed we're not going to New Orleans 
  together."
  
  "I'll make it up to you" he smiled. "I promise."
  
  "And I'll hold you to that sailor" she whispered. "You'll have to take me 
  somewhere really nice to make up for it."
  
  ***************
  Prince Sultan Air Force Base
  Saudi Arabia
  Three weeks later
  
  "You wanted me to take you somewhere," Harm grinned as they stepped off the 
  plane.
  
  "Wasn't what I had in mind sailor" Mac complained. "And I believe I said 
  somewhere nice."
 
 "What's not to like?" he grinned, gesturing to the hubbub of activity around them.
 
 "Harm women are second class citizens if that here," she reminded him patiently.  
"Even the women who are here defending this part of the world.  You didn't read the 
case file."
 
 "Yes I did, and I'm on your side remember."
 
 "Actually you're not, because my side is saying that she disobeyed orders and 
policy.  We don't get to pick the orders we agree with and just obey those you know."
 
 "Yes ma'am," he smiled. "You have jet lag."
 
 "Don't talk to me."
 
 Meetings with their client and then the Commanding General, coupled with the time 
difference and the flight left them both out of sorts.  "Lieutenant Donato has offered to 
take me up," he told her when they emerged from the second meeting."
 
 "I'll bet she did," Mac groaned.
 
 "Huh?"
 
 "Never mind.  Go.  Enjoy."
 
 "You're invited."
 
 "Well as fun as that sounds--another plane ride after spending twelve of the last 
twenty-four doing just that, I think I'll pass in favor of a cold shower and something for 
my headache," she sighed.  "You might want to walk me to my quarters first if you 
have time."
 
 "I can make time," he smiled.  Once inside her room at the guest house, he wasted 
no time in pulling her into his arms.  "I have needed to do that for hours," he 
whispered.  "This isn't going to be easy being apart."
 
 "No it's not," she acknowledged.  "But we'll suck it up.  Go on, have a good flight."
 
 "You're OK?"  
 
 "Yeah I just need a little down time that's all," she assured him. 
 
 "Remember I love you."
 
 "And I you.  Always."
 ==============
 "If I said you looked cute would you smack me?"  
 
 They were getting ready to drive off-post to meet with the prosecuting officer and 
Mac had garbed herself in the black outfit to include the face covering.
 
 "You'd be lucky if that's all I did," she retorted, "but it's a reg and you're not going to 
hear any complaint from me."
 
 "Right," Harm nodded, guiding her out to their car.
  
  "What do you think the Colonel will want?"
  
  "To turn our client into a civilian."
  
  "That would save her benefits. Might be our best option" Mac countered.
  
  "Do you really want to do that to her Mac?"
  
  She's doing it to herself Harm" Mac said as they reached the car.
  
  "Mac"
  
  "She came here to serve her country, not express her opinions."
  
  "Mac"
  
  "It's not hers to chose which orders to obey."
  
  "Mac"
  
  "What?" she said with a long look.
  
  "I have to drive. We're going off base." He held out his hand for the keys 
  and with a long sigh she handed them to him before walking around to the 
  passenger side.
  
  She started to open the front door when he looked over at her and pointed to 
  the back seat. With another long sigh she opened the back door and got in.
  
  A short time later they arrived at the arranged spot with Colonel Coffey, 
  Harm leading Mac into the building. She glanced around; noticing at once 
  that the men didn't pay any attention to her.
  
  She managed to stifle her comments as one ran into her, not bothering to 
  look twice to see if she was okay. Harm hadn't noticed, walking ahead of her 
  as if she didn't exist.
  
  "Do you see her?" Mac groaned from beneath the veil. She hated it, feeling 
  like she was about to suffocate under all the layers.
  
  "You're kidding right?" he scoffed, looking around the room and having no 
  clue how they would find her.
  
  They finally located Colonel Coffey and listened as she presented her deal.
  
  "We'll have to talk to our client" Harm replied.
  
  "No deal" Mac said as she tore off the veil.
  
  ********************
  "You want to tell me what happened back there?" he asked once they were back 
  on base.
  
  "I changed my mind" she sighed.
  
  "Without informing me? I'm your partner here remember. We're both supposed 
  to be on the same page."
  
  "I'm sorry. It was an impulse. You heard it when I felt it."
  
  "Felt what?"
  
  "The isolation you feel when you wear one of these things" she said 
  irritably as she threw the veil across the room. "You cease to exist.  Just hear me 
out."
 
 "Not until you've had a cold shower," he grinned, preparing to duck in case she 
picked up something to heave at him.
 
 "Harm. . ." she got out and gave up, totally frustrated more than angry.
  
  "Easy Marine" he said gently as he reached for her. "You'll never cease to 
  exist in my books."
  
  "Thank you" she sighed. "Cause after today I felt like I didn't even exist. 
  Even you ignored me."
  
  "I did not"
  
  "You did too."
  
  "I'm sorry. You know this isn't easy for me either. I don't like the fact 
  that you have to be treated like that when we're in public."
  
  "So we'll fight for Lt. Donato?"
  
  "Yes we will. But you know it won't be easy. We don't have much of a case."
  
  "Didn't take you for a quitter Commander?" Mac smiled.
  
  "I'm not" he whispered as he took her into his arms. "I didn't quit when it 
  came to you did I?"
  
  "And I'm glad you didn't" she sighed happily.
  
  ************************
  JAG HQ's
  1 Week Later
  
  "So how was Saudi Arabia?" Sturgis asked as he ran into Harm and Mac in the 
  break room before staff call. "Heard you did a hell of a job over there."
  
  "Hot" Mac smiled. "Anything new around here?"
  
  "Not much" Sturgis smiled.
  
  "Morning" Harriet said as she breezed in. "Commander thank you so much for 
  baby-sitting the other night. Little AJ loved you and Bobbi."
  
  "You and Bobbi baby-sat?" Harm grinned. "I uh, didn't know you and the 
  Congresswoman were that close."
  
  "We're trying this dating thing" Sturgis replied. "Our first date didn't go 
  so smoothly so for the second one we tried something a little different."
  
  "I would have never pictured Bobbi as the kid type" Harm mused.
  
  "Guess you didn't know her that well then" Sturgis grinned as he walked out.
  
  A few minutes later they gathered in the conference room for staff call.
 
 "You two must have made quite a pair," Sturgis sighed, getting a picture of Harm 
and Bobbi.
 
 "Not really," he smiled, feeling Mac's eyes bore into him.  They had never spoken of 
the night she had come for his help when Chris Ragle was in town.   Which was just 
as well from his point of view.  He was not proud of the memory.  Not proud of how 
he went blithely on planning dinner, and the aftermath, with Bobbi.
 
 It was but twelve hours later that the chopper set Harm and Mac down on the deck 
of the Seahawk.  
 
 "You've been aboard so often you must have your own stateroom," she declared.
 
 "Not quite," he smiled, but his eyes were not on her, but on the flight deck and the 
activity swirling there.
 
 "Well that explains your green eyes."
 
 That did get his attention and he looked to her quizzically.
 
 "Watching  younger  men doing what you love best."
 
 "Don't count me out yet."
 
 She rolled her eyes and followed him in, but a little prickle of alarm went through her.  
It had not occurred to her that he might fly while they were aboard.  Before May, she 
would not have given the matter much thought.  Now the idea that he could do a 
mission, in a combat zone no less, was not setting well with her.
 
 It remained on her mind through the long meeting they had while they lectured the 
officers on the rules of engagement.  Finally feeling suffocated and badly in need of 
air, she excused herself and walked on deck. 
 
 Harm was not far behind her, but the rumble of the F14s as they took off distracted 
him and he found himself on Buzzard's Row, watching the activity, taking deep 
breaths of the jet fuel tinged air.
 
 "Hi!"
 
 He froze for a moment, hearing her behind him and took a long breath, reminding 
himself that they were in fact together and reveling in that knowledge.
 
 "Hey! How'd you know where I was?"
  
  "Where else would you be on a carrier during ops?"
 
  "In the front seat of an F-14."
 
   "Not this trip."  She bit back an accompanying 'and I can thank God for that'.  
Memories of that stormy night in May were all too recent and all too prevalent in her 
nightmares even still.
 
  "I can dream."
 
 She gave a long sigh, thinking of his words and his reaction to being at sea.  "You 
know, I'm starting to understand how you feel, Harm."
 
 He looked at her in surprise, waiting for her to explain.
 
 "When I was onboard the LHA, I got an idea of what it's like to be 
 out at sea. Everything else--whatever personal problems you might 
 have--it all goes away. Nothing seems important in the face of what 
 you're doing."
 
 "There was a time you hated it here," he pointed out softly, a gentle smile playing on 
his lips.
 
 "Nothing stays the same."  She did not have to add that the two of them were very 
different people from the partners who last shared a shipboard assignment.
 
 "Tell me about it."
 
 She swallowed back quiet tears of happiness, giving him a slight shake of her head.
 
 "I'm glad you're here."  They were simple words, but they went right to her heart.  'I'm 
glad you're here'.  'Come to me'.  'You know the reason'.   'You should Sarah'.  All 
ways he had told her he loved her in the past.  And now he could say the exact 
words.  Life was beautiful.
   "I'm glad I'm here too," she said softly. "I've hating being apart from you 
  on these last few cases. And it wasn't the same in Saudi Arabia."
  
  "What do you say we go grab some dinner?" he smiled. "And then you can stop 
  by and visit me in my quarters for a while."
  
  "I'd like that" she smiled. "You got the movie for later too."
  
  "No but we could make our own" he whispered.
  
  ****************
  Next morning
  
  "Hey there you are" Mac said as she met Harm in the passageway. "I thought 
  you were going to wait for me."
  
  "Captain Johnson wanted to see me."
  
  "Anything wrong?" she frowned.
  
  "No. He asked me to fly the next mission. I have to at the briefing in 15 
  minutes."
  
  "You're going to fly?" she whispered.
  
  "Hey don't make it sound so bad" he smiled. "He just wants someone who has a 
  knowledge of the rules as well as combat experience to show the others how 
  it's done."
  
  "Wow. Looks like you're going to get your wish after all" she said quietly.
  
  "Okay Marine, what's wrong?" he said as he led her into a quiet corner.
  
  "Nothing" she lied.
  
  "Liar. We're closer than that remember? Now talk to me."
  
  "I'm just nervous about you going up again," she admitted. "I handled you 
  doing cover for the Superbowl cause I knew the chances of anything happening 
  were pretty slim. But this is the real thing Harm."
  
  "Yeah I know," he said quietly. "But I've done this before Mac. You know 
  that. It's not a big deal."
  
  "I know you've done this before. But that was before I knew I loved you. 
  Before you became the single most important person in my life. I love you 
  and the idea of anything happening to you scares me to death."
  
  "Nothing is going to happen."
  
  "Then why am I having flashbacks to last May" she whispered as she fought to 
  keep the tears at bay.
  
  "Don't. That's not going to happen again. I need you to hold it together 
  Marine. We've got a briefing and the Captain is going to want you involved 
  on this as well."
  
  "Promise me you'll be okay. Because if you promise me, I know it'll be 
  okay."
  
  "I promise. I love you Sarah and there's no way I'm not coming back to you."
  
  "Okay I can do this then," she said with a deep breath. "Let's go."
  
  A short time later she stood beside Harm as Captain Johnson briefed the 
  squadron on the mission. She managed to keep her fear hidden, even with 
  Johnson's warning that there might be weather problems over the target area.
  
  "You okay?" he asked softly as they walked out of the briefing."
  
  "Yeah I'm fine," she said with a forced smile. "I can handle this. I 
  promise."
  
  "Everything is going to be fine. I promise."
  
  She stood at his side as he suited up for the mission, a young Lt. finally 
  approaching them.
  
  "Lt. Jorgenson?" Harm asked.
  
  "Commander. Colonel" she nodded. "Understand I'll be flying with you sir."
  
  "Excellent. Best RIO I ever had was a woman" Harm smiled, glancing quickly 
  at Mac. He hadn't known his RIO was going to be a woman.
  
  "Was sir?"
  
  "Uh still is" Harm said quickly. "Whoever she's flying with is a damn lucky 
  pilot."
  
  "First time we met, Skates was aboard the Seahawk" Mac spoke up.
  
  "That her call sign?" Lt. Jorgenson asked.
  
  "It is" Mac nodded. "Harm saved her life and then defended her when she was 
  falsely accused."
  
  "Then I dumped an F-14 in the drink and damn near drowned both of us. 
  Afterwards she uh saved me from dying of hypothermia."
  
  "Commander do a lot of things happen to you?"
  
  "That week" Harm smiled.
  
  "This should be interesting" she sighed. "See you up top."
  
  She left them alone and with a smile Harm looked over at Mac.
  
  "You going to wish me good luck this time?" he said softly.
  
  "Damn right I am," she said as she looked around. Noting they were alone at 
  the moment, she moved to place a kiss on his cheek.
  
  "That's not going to cut it this time" he whispered before their lips met in 
  a long kiss.
  
 "Lt. Jorgenson only wishes she was me," she giggled softly.  "Don't you and her be 
fooling around in the backseat up there OK?"
 
 "And you while I'm gone don't find some hot young Ensign who wants to show you 
the storage deck OK?"
 
 "Kinky," she smiled.  "Go on.  Make me proud.  I love you."
 
 "Love you," he whispered.  "Come watch me take-off?"
 
 She did just that, even though her heart was in her throat as she watched the 
Tomcat climb away from the ship.  "Godspeed," she whispered.
 ================
  "I'm singled out from battle damage" Harm's voice came across the radio, chilling 
Mac to the bone.  "I'm going to need some help aboard."
 
Her eyes widened with alarm.  The very thing she had prayed against was 
happening.  He was in trouble, and there was fear in his voice.  These men listening 
to him did not hear it, but she did.  Did because she knew him so well.
  
  "Please lord. Please let him land safely."  She did not realize she had said that 
audibly enough to be heard until the Captain shot her a sympathetic glance and gave 
her a small nod, which somehow made her feel just a little better.
  
  "Hawker four this is the Captain. Come on in, we have a ready deck."
  
  "Roger that Captain. I've shut down one engine and I don't have full power 
  on the other. I'd like to make it on the first pass."
  
  Mac looked at Captain Johnson anxiously, her fear increasing with those words, and 
again she heard the tinge of alarm in his voice.  If he was upset there was reason to 
be, and yet she didn't doubt his ability.  It was just that that same ability did not help 
him last May and she was afraid now as she was all those months ago.  
  
  "You're a little low" Paddles voice now. "Keep your speed up."
  
  "Come on Harm" Mac said silently as she closed her eyes, willing him to get 
  through this. "You can do this.  Come back to me Harm.  Come back for us.  You 
know the reason."
  
  "Burner now"
  
  "It's not lighting"
  
  "Please Lord" Mac murmured inaudibly, not sure what that meant but the tone sent 
a bolt of fear through her, as Paddles yell of "Eject--Eject"  assaulted her ears.
  
  "Negative" Harm declared, "we can do this."    
 
 Mac's squeezed her eyes shut and a few seconds later felt Captain Johnson tap her 
shoulder, and heard what had to be the sweetest words ever.  "He's down safe."
 
 "Thank you," she breathed.  "Sir, excuse me?"
 
 "Of course.  Tell your partner I'll speak to him later."
 
 "Yes sir."  
 
 "I was right--things happen around you," Lt. Jorgenson was saying as she and Harm 
walked down the corridor toward her.
 
 Her arms ached to hold him.  Instead she simply smiled.  "Welcome home."
 
 "Ma'am," Lt. Jorgenson nodded to her, looking from Harm to Mac.
 
 "Lieutenant I'll meet you in the ready room," Harm told her and she knew she was 
being dismissed.
 
 "How nice, you've made a friend," Mac teased, wanting to diffuse some of the 
tension she was feeling.
 
 "Were you worried?" he asked gently.
 
 "I need to hug you," she whispered with a wan smile, looking around nervously.
 
 "Just what I was thinking," he grinned taking her arm.  Exactly thirty seconds later he 
had pulled her into a secluded area off the deck.  "OK what are you waiting for?"  
  
  She didn't wait a second longer, throwing herself into his arms in one swift 
  move.
  
  "God I was so scared" she whispered as they clung to each other tightly.  
  "Don't you ever do that to me again."
  
  "Sorry" he sighed as he tightened his hold on her. "I knew you would be 
  there on the bridge listening to every word and I didn't want you to know 
  how scared I was too."
  
  "Were you really?" she asked as she gently pulled away to look at him.
  
  "Do you want the real answer or the pilot's bravado answer" he smiled.
  
  "I want to know what Harmon Rabb Jr. was feeling. Not what Commander Rabb 
  was thinking."
  
  "I was scared to death that I was never going to see you again. That what 
  little time we'd had was all I was going to get in this lifetime."
  
  "Someone's looking out for you sailor" Mac whispered. "Cause for a moment I 
  thought I was going to lose you. Paddles was screaming for you to eject and 
  I kept waiting to see a ball of flames on the deck."
  
  "I wasn't going to do that again if I could help it" Harm sighed. "And 
  fortunately Lt. Jorgenson held herself together pretty well. Otherwise we 
  might not be having this conversation."
  
  "Don't even say that" Mac whispered as she walked into his arms again, 
  needing the comfort of his arms around her. "I would die if I lost you."
  
  "As would I if I lost you" Harm said softly. "And you know I'd love to stay 
  here like this but I do need to get down to the ready room."
  
  "I know" she nodded as she let go of him again. "Duty calls. You know where 
  my cabin is when you're finished debriefing."
  
  "And you know I'll be there" he said softly. "I love you Mac. And you may 
  hear those words a lot from me in the next few days."
  
  "I can handle that" she smiled. "Go before Captain Johnson sends an email to 
  the Admiral asking him about his two senior officers. God knows I barely 
  managed to hold it together on the bridge and he's probably wondering what 
  kind of Marine officer I am."
  
  "You're the best Marine officer I know," he said softly. "And I'm sure the 
  Captain didn't notice anything."
  
  "Let's hope."
  
  "I'll see you later" he promised. "You okay now?"
  
  "Now that you're back on the ground with me, I'm fine" she assured him. 
  "Go."
  
  "I love you" he smiled again.
  
  "I love you too" she whispered. "See you later."
  
  ********************
  "Home sweet home" Harm groaned a long forty-eight hours later when they 
  finally arrived back at Mac's place.
  
  "All I want is my bed and your arms around me" Mac sighed. "At least for the 
  next twenty four."
  
  "You hope. You really think the Admiral is going to give us that long?"
  
  "We can hope right?" she smiled tiredly as they walked to the bedroom.
  
  "At least we get to be alone again" Harm sighed as they climbed into bed 
  together, Mac quickly finding a comfortable spot close to him. "I hated 
  sleeping without you on the Seahawk."
  
  "That part does suck" she agreed. "Course even if everyone knew we were 
  together they wouldn't allow us to bunk together."
  
  He was about to reply when Mac's phone rang and without a second thought he 
  reached for.
  
  "Colonel Mackenzie's residence."
  
  "Commander what are you doing answering the Colonel's phone." AJ's voice and 
  for a moment Harm was tongue twisted.
  
  "I..uh.." he stammered. "We uh, just got back sir and I was just dropping 
  Mac off."
  
  "I see. Well go home and grab a few hours of sleep because I need here first 
  thing in the morning."
  
  "Something wrong sir?" Harm asked.
  
  "Roberts" AJ sighed. "I had to bring charges against him."
  
  "You're joking" Harm said before he could stop himself.
  
  "I don't joke at midnight Commander" AJ said tersely. "I'll explain it to 
  you in the morning. But I want your six here first thing."
  
  "Aye sir" Harm replied. "I'll be there."
  
  "By the way, welcome back" AJ continued. "I heard you had a bit of 
  excitement on the Seahawk. You do know how to find trouble don't you 
  Commander."
  
  "Yes sir I do" Harm sighed.
  
  "Tell the Colonel welcome back as well and I'll see you both in the 
  morning."
  
  "So much for sleeping in" Harm groaned as he hung up the phone. "The Admiral 
  filed charges against Bud for something. God only knows what he did this 
  time."
  
  "Killed Singer in a fit of rage" Mac laughed. "Course that would be 
  justifiable homicide."
   
 "Nah he has orders from me never to touch her. That pleasure is all mine," he 
muttered. "On the other hand speaking of pleasure, I've had to keep my hands to 
myself for the past god knows how many hours and if I don't get to make love to you, 
I'm not going to be responsible."
 
 "Well we can't have you going off the deep end can we Commander," she 
murmured.
================= 
 Dereliction of duty--AJ said he had no choice.  Harm looked around the office, 
desperately wishing Mac had not be diverted to another case.  He needed her with 
him on this.  Bud looked scared, and rightly so. AJ detailed the case and appointed 
Sturgis trial counsel and Harm would defend. 
 
 "Sir I'm glad," Bud nodded.  "I know it's going to be OK."
 
 "You know you'll get my best shot," Harm assured him, escorting him from the office 
just as Mac approached.
 
 "Bud I just heard, I'm so sorry," she said at once.  "I wish there was something I 
could do."
 
 "There is," Harm said firmly.  "You can be our expert witness on procedures at JAG."
 
 "Oh Bud no, that's really not a good idea," she objected at once.  "The hearing 
officer might perceive my testimony as biased."
 
 "We'll take that chance," Harm told her.  
 
 "Lieutenant I don't recommend it," she insisted and Bud nodded reluctantly.
 
 "No ma'am it's OK.  That you believe in me is enough."
"She liked you."
 
 "She did not. She was just being friendly."
 
 "Harm, she was dying to jump your bones" Mac laughed as she let them into 
 her apartment. They'd driven home separately from the bar and were now 
 discussing Caroline. "She didn't pay attention to anyone in the bar but 
 you."
 
 "You're jealous" he smiled.
 
 "I am not. Course it would have been nice if you hadn't ignored me the whole 
 time."
 
 "What was I supposed to do? She was the one who was all over me. You could 
 have helped out a little."
 
 "Hey your fair game as far as everyone else is concerned" Mac grinned. "If 
 I'd protected you they would have been suspicious."
 
 "And that's why I played along with her" Harm grinned.
 
 "Yeah right" Mac said as she gave him a playful swat on the six. "I'm sure 
 that's it."
 
 "It is Ms. Mackenzie" he whispered as he pulled her into his arms. "Because 
 I love you. Not Caroline, not Bobbi. The only woman who has the key to my 
 heart is you Sarah. Don't ever forget that."
=============

 "Have you even told Harm about this?" Mac all but screeched.  She was in Sturgis's 
office, summoned by him, and now being requested to testify for the government.
 
 "No, but he'll be allowed to object in the courtroom.  Mac you know how these things 
work.  Please.  I'm in a bind here.  I could ask the Admiral to compel you to testify but 
I don't want to do that, and I don't want a continuance.  I don't know when she'll be 
back.  Family emergency could be weeks.  It will all be over in fifteen minutes."
 
 "Yeah well I just hope something else isn't over in the same time," she muttered 
again, just low enough that he did not hear.
 
 Harm's eyes bored into her back the entire length of the aisle and she kept her own 
eyes straight ahead, not having the strength to meet his gaze until she turned to take 
the oath.  It was as if she was watching it all play out on TV, so surreal the 
experience was.  She heard Harm object, heard the presiding Admiral offer him a 
chance to interview her and breathed a long sigh of relief when he declined.  
 
 In his usual total professional manner, Sturgis asked her the questions she 
expected.  She answered quietly, keeping here eyes fixed on a point at the back of 
the courtroom, with only an occasional glance at Harm.  He was listening with that 
same intent expression he wore when hearing other witnesses, his face not giving 
away any emotion.  Finally he rose to the cross examination, and only then did she 
look into his eyes, begging him to understand.  
 
 For just a half second, he gave her a small smile.  For his own part, he was just as 
worried as she.  Worried that she would take personally his cross, especially given 
the tact on which he was basing his line of questions.
   
  As she answered his questions, she tried to remember he was doing what he 
  was doing to help his client. Not hurt her. This was the man that loved her. 
  He was only doing what he had too. He'd told her once in the beginning that 
  what happened in the court room stayed in the court room. It wasn't 
  personal.
  
  "No further questions your honor" Harm said finally and she let out a long 
  sigh of relief. It was over.
  
  *******************
  "God I hated that so much" Harm sighed as he lay in her arms hours later. 
  "When I did it to Renee that time it never bothered me. But I hated doing 
  that to you."
  
  "Hey you were just doing your job," she said as she gently played with his 
  hair. "And with the way you're going you're going to get Bud off. I know it. 
  He's got the best working for him."
  
  "I just hope so. Sturgis has a good case against him."
  
  "You'll get him off. You kept me out of Leavenworth didn't you?"
  
  "Yes I did" he sighed. "And Bud isn't looking at Leavenworth but a guilty 
  verdict is going to ruin his career. And he's worked too hard to lose it."
  
  "You'll come up with something. You always do. Just when Sturgis thinks he's 
  got you beat, you pull that rabbit out of the hat and win the case."
  
  ************
  The weeks passed with them growing even closer, their relationship still 
  unknown by their coworkers and friends. No one knew that outside of JAG the 
  Commander and Colonel were working on the dream they'd both waited so long 
  for.
  
  On this warm May day, they'd both managed to secure the afternoon off. 
  They'd been working none stop helping Clay find an Al Qaeda terrorist 
  suspected of plotting a major terrorist event with no luck and both were in 
  desperate need of some down time. Harm had suggested a picnic in the park 
  and Mac had jumped at the idea.
  
  "Do you think the Admiral thought it was weird that we both wanted off?" she 
  sighed as she rummaged through the picnic basket and pulled out the 
  sandwiches.
  
  "Not after all the hours we've been logging" Harm smiled. "Trust me, we 
  deserve an afternoon off. The world won't come to end if we do and if it 
  does well then I'll die a happy man because you'll be in my arms when it 
  does."
  
  "Same here" she sighed as she dropped back against him while she nibbled on 
  her sandwich.  "You know every once in a while I have to pinch myself and 
  make sure this is real. I can't believe we've manage to keep this quiet from 
  everyone for this long."
  
  "You never knew you were such a good actress did you?"
  
  "No. That or everyone knows and they're just playing along until we fess 
  up."
  
  "Doubt it. If they know they'd say something. The only one who might have a 
  clue is Sturgis. Only because you let it slip to him."
  
  "Hey I just said I was in love with you" she smiled. "That's it. Nothing 
  more."
  
  "He has no clue," Harm said softly. "No clue that I love you more than 
  anything in this world."
  
  "Rabb you're so sappy sometimes" she laughed. "And I love it. Almost as much 
  as I love you."
  
  "Maybe we should skip lunch" Harm whispered as he took the sandwich from her 
  hand before rolling her onto the ground, his lips finding hers in a long 
  kiss.
  
  "I’m all for skipping lunch" she panted when they finally parted.
  
  "Me too" he smiled before their lips joined again.
  
  "Gee you two this is a public park. If you want to keep this a secret you 
  should go back to one of your places."
  
  At the sound of Clayton Webb's voice Harm froze. "Webb" he mouthed and Mac 
  nodded. With a long groan he rolled over, looking up at Webb's smiling face.
  
  "Hi Harm" Clay smiled. "When did you two get together?"
  
  "None of your business and if you tell anyone you saw us like this you're a 
  dead man" Harm threatened.
  
 "Tell people and destroy perfectly good blackmail material," Clay smirked.  "I think 
not."
 
 "Give it a rest Webb.  Now for what reason are you following us over here and it had 
better be important."
 
 "Yeah it is," he said quietly.  "The op is a go.  We leave in twenty-four for the 
Seahawk."
 
 "Clay you certainly know how to kill a mood," Mac sighed.  "But I'm glad we're going.  
It's nerve-wracking just awaiting the word."
 
 "I'll see you at 1400 at Andrews," Clay told them.  "And for crying out loud, get a 
room."  As quickly as he had come he was gone.
 
 Both Harm and Mac were silent for a long while, simply lying together, she resting 
against his chest while he idly rubbed her back.  "Harm you OK?" she finally asked.  
"I mean I know we've got a big thing ahead of us, but you're really super quiet there."
 
 "Uh. . .just got something else on my mind," he finally said, the wheels of thought 
spinning inside.  "I want you to pack your stuff and then come to my place tonight.  
Dinner and then we'll leave from there in the morning OK."
 
 "Yeah sure, but still there's something bothering you--something more than the 
mission."  
 
 "Just something I have to take care of," he assured her.  "In fact you'll know tonight.  
Let's eat shall we."
 
 "OK, but if you're getting ready to tell me things between us aren't going to work out, 
I'd rather you just said it straight out."  Her voice was light but her smile did not reach 
all the way to her eyes.
 
 "Yeah that's exactly it," he scoffed, taking hold of her arms.  "I love you Sarah 
Mackenzie.  And I don't mind telling you this assignment is scaring me to death that 
you're going into the middle of this madness they're calling war on terrorism."
 
 "The only thing that would scare me would be to be back here waiting for news on 
you," she vowed.  "I'm glad I'm going.  No regrets Sailor."
 ==================
 HARM's APARTMENT
 7PM
 
 "Hey come in," Harm smiled, opening the door and stopping to take in her 
appearance.  She had foregone her usual jeans and sweater for a dark green dress 
that clung to her in all the right places.
 
 "I was sensing we were having a special dinner for our last night in CONUS and I 
thought I'd dress," she said softly, melding into his arms for his hello kiss.  "And I see 
I was right."
 
 The table was set with candles and china on a white linen table cloth and the aroma 
of eggplant parmesan filled the small apartment.
 
 "No mission talk during dinner," he stipulated as he guided her to the table.
 
 It was over tiramisu and coffee that his motivation for all he had done came out.  
With a deep breath for courage he reached across the table and took her left hand.  
"Sarah Mackenzie I love you, and when we come back. . .well I want us to. . .to take 
this further," he stammered nervously, and a second later she felt the cool touch of 
metal being slipped on to her finger.  Precious metal.  A gold band holding a single 
perfectly round diamond.
 

 
  "Harm" she gasped.
  
  "Is this too soon?" he said softly. "I mean if you're not ready for this 
  then"
  
  "It's not too soon" she interrupted him. "I just wasn't expecting this is 
  all."
  
  "Is that good or bad?"
  
  "It's a good surprise" she said softly. "Because I love you just as much 
  Harmon Rabb and this is the moment I've been wishing up for a very long time for."
  
  "Me too" he smiled. "And with all we've been involved in the past few weeks, 
  it's made me realize that we're not guaranteed anything in this life. So 
  just in case" His voice trailed off and she nodded her understanding.
  
  "I know" she whispered. "I've thought about that a lot recently."
  
  "I just want you to know that you are the only person I want to spend my 
  life Sarah."
  
  "Ditto" she sniffled, feeling a sudden stinging of tears. "I guess this 
  means we're going to have to come clean with everyone if I'm going to be 
  wearing this."
  
  "Yeah we will" he nodded. "But I wanted to wait until all this mess with 
  Clay was over before we spoke to the Admiral about us."
  
  "Might be a good idea" she said softly. "But I rather being wearing it."
  
  "You can" he said after a moment's pause. "Just put it on a chain. The one 
  you have on now will work."
  
  "That's how I kept Mic's ring for a long time" she said quietly. "Course in 
  this case it's only staying on the chain until we can tell the Admiral and 
  then it's going to the proper place."
  
  "Is that okay?"
  
  "Yeah. I just want it close to me" she said softly. "To remind me of you and 
  your promise."
  
  "And it's a promise I fully intend to keep once we're done with this mess" 
  he smiled. "I love you Sarah. Please don't ever forget that."
  
  "I won't" she whispered as she played with the ring on her finger. "I really 
  hate to take this off now that it's in place."
  
  "You don't have to yet. It's just us tonight. Tomorrow before we leave I'll 
  put it on the chain for you."
  
  "Thank you Harm" she said suddenly. "For tonight. For the ring. For 
  everything."
  
  "This is just the beginning Sarah" he whispered. "I promise."
  
  With that he stood up and walked over to her side of the table, gently 
  taking her hand and bringing her to her feet. A second later she was in his 
  arms as he carried her to the bedroom. For the rest of the night there was 
  no war, no terrorists to thwart. There was just Harm and Sarah, showing each 
  other the depth of their love.
  
  "You ready?" he asked the next morning after they'd both showered and 
  dressed. They were back in uniform, back to being the Commander and the 
  Colonel.
  
  "Just have to do one last thing" she whispered as she slipped the ring from 
  her finger before looping the chain through it. She reached around with the 
  necklace and he took the chain from her, latching it into place.  She turned 
  around and his hands reached up, gently fingering the ring on the chain.
  
  "I liked it better on your finger" he said softly.
  
  "When we get back" she smiled.
  
  **************
  May 21st, 2002
  USS Seahawk
  
  "When we get back"
  
  Mac's words echoed through Harm's mind as he held the ring and chain tightly 
  in his hand. He'd never wanted to believe that one of them might not be 
  coming back.
  
  "Please God, don't take her from me" he whispered as he clutched the ring 
  close to him. "Not now."
  
  He closed his eyes in a desperate attempt to keep the tears that were 
  threatening at bay. He couldn't lose her. Not after the last six months 
  together. Not when he hadn't had a chance to fulfill his promise to her.
  
  "Sir"
  
  At the sound of Bud's voice, his eyes flew open.
  
  "Sir are you okay? I heard what happened to Colonel Mackenzie."
  
  "No Bud I'm not okay" Harm managed in a voice that cracked with emotion. "I 
  love her Bud. I wanted to marry her." His voice broke and his hand opened to 
  reveal the ring that was in his hand.
 
  Bud stared at the band of gold in his friend's hand.  "Sir, I. . .I wish I knew what. . ."  
 
 "Harm my God I just heard."  Sturgis's words rescued Bud who gave a long sigh of 
relief.  "How is she?  Can we see her?  How are you holding up?"
 
 Before he could answer, AJ and Clay joined them, all staring at Harm, who at that 
moment could not find his voice.  He held out the ring, letting in dangle in the sun.
 
 "They were going to be married," Bud supplied, giving Harm a long look of 
sympathy.
 
 "I know."  Clay was the first to speak and everyone, to include Harm, looked to him 
quizzically.  "Mac told me.  We had a lot of time to talk in between. . ."
 
 "In between you letting her get hurt."  Harm suddenly found his voice and stepped 
forward, menacingly enough that Clay took a step back in apprehension.
 
 "Harm that's not how it was," AJ spoke up, stepping between the officer and the 
agent.  "Not at all.  It wasn't something Clay could have prevented.  He's debriefed 
me completely on what happened."
 
 Harm looked over AJ's shoulder, giving Clay a long almost hateful glare.  
 
 "Son you need to calm yourself," AJ said with just enough firmness in his voice that 
Harm could hear the authority.  "Clay in fact saved her life, and took a bullet in his 
arm for his trouble."
 
 Harm then noticed the bandage around his upper arm and the fight went from his 
body.  "This is true?"
 
 "No biggie," he shrugged sheepishly.  "But Harm you should know what happened.  
Your Marine was more than amazing in action.  The mission succeeded only 
because of her.  The Admiral is putting her for a citation at my insistence.  And I know 
you'll be the one to pin it on her."
 
 Harm nodded numbly.  "I wanted to do much more.  I wanted to marry her."  The 
hand holding the ring trembled and AJ reached out to catch the shimmering object.
 
 "And you shall.  Don't you dare count her out yet Mr. Rabb.  She deserves better 
than that from you.  And when she's able, if she would want, I'm going to walk her 
down the aisle to you."
 
 A sharp shudder went through him at those words.  "Yes sir.  Thank you," he 
managed.
 
 "Why don't we get some coffee, and maybe make a stop at the chapel," Sturgis 
offered, putting a strong hand on his friend's shoulder.  "They'll find us if they need 
us."
 ==============
 It was nearly two hours later before that moment arrived.  Harm, having requested 
some time alone, was standing on Vulture's Row, watching the smooth operations of 
the flight deck below, and wondering how that was ever important to him.  Important 
now was the woman he loved, fighting for her life in a cramped operating room 
several decks below.
 
 "Harm?"  
 
 Sturgis.  They had sent Sturgis for him.  Who better to relay bad news that someone 
that close to him.  "They should have let me be with her when she died," he said 
bitterly, feeling warm tears on his face.
 
 "Good god Rabb you are such a pessimist," Sturgis scoffed.  "The corpsman said to 
come find you.  She's awake and asking for you."
"She's alive" Harm whispered, not able to believe what he'd just heard.
 
 "Very much alive and very much wanting to see you" Sturgis smiled. "So let's 
 not keep the lady waiting shall we."
 
 Minutes later he slowly made his way into the small room where she lay. He 
 swallowed hard at the sight of her, lying so pale and weak among all the 
 tubes and wires. But she was alive. That was all that mattered.
 
 "Harm" she whispered as her eyes slowly opened.
 
 "Yeah it's me honey," he said softly as he hurried to her side, gently 
 taking her hand in his. "I'm right here Sarah."
 
 "I love you" she murmured.
 
 "I love you too Marine" he whispered. "I was so afraid I was going to lose 
 you. I didn't know what I was going to do without you. The only solace I had 
 was that at least you'd known that I loved you and wanted to marry you."
 
 "That's what kept me fighting. I have too much too live for now."
 
 "Yeah you do" he whispered as the tears ran unchecked down his face. She 
 weakly reached a hand to his cheek to wipe them away and he caught in his 
 and brought it to his lips and kissed it gently. "Because we have a future 
 together to plan."
 
 "A long future" she sighed happily as her eyes drifted shut again, only to 
 open a second later. "Don't leave me," she said softly.
 
 "I will never leave you again Sarah" he promised. "I love you and I will 
 always be beside you."
 
 She smiled as he leaned forward and dropped a kiss onto her lips.
 
 "Do you have my ring?" she whispered as she fought to stay awake.
 
 "Would you like me to put in back where it belongs" he smiled as he gently 
 pulled it off the chain.
 
 "Please" she murmured.
 
 He gently reached for her left hand and slowly slid the ring back onto her 
 finger.
 
 "I love you Sarah. And as soon as you're ready I want to marry you."
 
 "Is tomorrow too soon?" she whispered before her eyes fell shut again.
 
 "Never my love" he said as he leaned down for another kiss. "Never."
 
 Epilogue
 June 1st, 2002
 6:00 PM
 
 Tomorrow turned out to be eleven days later as the small group of friends 
 gathered at the Chapel at Annapolis for an impromptu wedding. Only with the 
 help of big guns like Admiral Chegwidden and Admiral Boone had they been 
 able to pull off another wedding at a chapel that was already booked for 
 every hour from early afternoon to early evening.  The Chaplain at Annapolis 
 had been more than happy to allow Chaplain Turner to handle this last 
 service for him at the late hour.
 
 "Ready Mac?" AJ smiled. "Your groom is nervously waiting."
 
 She nodded and with just a handful of witnesses, AJ led her down the aisle 
 to where Harm stood nervously with Chaplain Turner.
 
 "I love you" he whispered as soon as AJ handed her to him.
 
 "I love you too" she smiled.
 
 "You two ready?" Chaplain Turner asked and Harm nodded as he took both her 
 hands in his.
 
 Twenty minutes later, with their love pledged to each other in front of God 
 and their friends, they were pronounced man and wife.
 
 "Harmon you may kiss your bride" Chaplain Turner smiled.
 
 "Hi Mrs. Rabb" Harm whispered before their lips met in a long and passionate 
 kiss.
 
 "Wow" Mac whispered when they parted. "I think I like being Mrs. Rabb."
 
 He laughed and took her hand in his as they turned to face their friends, 
 receiving a loud applause.
 
 "Webb how long ago did you find out they were together?" AJ mused as he 
 stood next to the CIA agent.
 
 "Just found out the day before we went to the Seahawk" Clay smiled. "If I'd 
 known these two were that good at undercover work, I would have recruited 
 them a long time ago."
 
 The End
	Or the beginning—it could be just this simple.