'TRACES IN THE SNOW'



Author: Daenar
Email: daenarchurill@hotmail.com
Rating: G, except for parts of the fourth chapter that might need a 
PG-13 
rating.
Category: Romance (H/M), Drama

Disclaimer: JAG is property of Belisarius Productions, Paramount and 
CBS. 
The story 'Traces in the Sand' is written by Margaret Fishback Powers. 
No 
copyright infringement intended.

Spoiler: Mac gets a Christmas surprise she never expected - and Harm 
finds 
himself involved in it head over heels... The story refers to Mac's 
assignment as carrier JAG on the USS Guadalcanal in Indonesia at the 
beginning of season seven.

Author's note: I realized that writing about real events might cause 
pain 
and uneasiness with those who were in some way affected by them. That's 
why 
I'd like to explain why I decided to write this story: to show the 
horror of 
terrorism from a different angle, to show that even the victims can 
grow 
wings and carry on and demonstrate to the aggressors that they won't 
break 
us.

I had the idea to this story two days after the Bali bombing. Like my 
vignette about 9/11, it generated from the need to clear my head from 
something I experienced earlier that day in the editorial office.

A young couple, 26 and 25 years old, from Potsdam where my newspaper is 
edited, called us and told us that they were tourists that had just 
gotten 
back from Bali where, by incredible chance, they escaped the attacks by 
mere 
minutes. They were both injured and wanted to make their case known to 
force 
German politicians to stop talking and support the anti-terror 
coalition 
without premises. I went there, interviewed them and witnessed their 
horror. 
It was an encounter that thoroughly shook me. What Lily tells about the 
events is - more or less - what the young woman told me that she lived 
through that night.


Many, many thanks to Katie M. for beta-reading!




Dec. 19th, 2002
1647 ZULU
Harbor, Dock 142
Baltimore, MD



The sun fought hard against the milky-white veil that covered the sky. 
One 
could make out its brilliant circle through the clouds, and a few rays 
even 
managed to break through, painting the city's silhouette in the colors 
of a 
dreamy twilight. Grim frost had taken over all of the East Coast for 
about a 
week now. Even down in Georgia, temperatures didn't climb higher than 
the 
thirties. The air was crisp and clear, telling of the snow that was 
soon 
expected.

The Lombok Queen had arrived about three hours ago, with a shipment of 
freshly cut tropical wood for the US market. Having broken its journey 
only 
in Japan and Panama, the ship had been underway for eight weeks now 
since it 
had set off from Surabaya on the island of Java, Indonesia. The crew 
knew 
they were lucky. They got to spend Christmas in the States before 
starting 
their journey back on January 2nd. All were eager to unload the cargo 
as 
quickly as possible, bustling around the ship without paying attention 
to 
their surroundings.

Deep down in the ship's cargo bay, Deke Miller from Baltimore Port 
Authority 
stumbled over something in the shadows and fell. "Crap!" Deke examined 
his 
ripped coverall and looked around to see what he had tripped over. 
There, in 
the corner... that had to be the object in question, but he could have 
sworn 
that it had been longer. How else could it have gotten in his way? Deke 
cautiously approached the corner, and his heart skipped a beat. "For 
Christ's sake!!! How did the kid get here?"



Dec. 19th, 2002
1658 ZULU
Baltimore Port Authority
Baltimore, MD



Deputy Vern Morris wiped his forehead, sighing heavily. The girl didn't 
talk. She just kept looking at him with those huge, deeply terrified 
eyes 
that seemed even larger given the fact that she was all but starving. 
How 
old could she be, nine maybe? Ten? Her body was badly bruised, even 
showed 
traces of inflamed burns. She was running a fever, and she was 
incredibly 
dirty. But the thing that ripped most at the deputy's heart was the 
expression of sheer panic that seemed to paralyze her completely.

"What do we do about her?" Deke approached Vern, sorrow making his brow 
furrow.

Again Vern sighed. "I have no idea. Call family services? The INS? 
Let's 
hope Miranda finds something that will give us a hint." He cast a 
rather 
doubtful look in the direction of the office where his young colleague 
from 
the BPD was right now cleaning the girl up a bit, trying to find any 
indication of who she might be among the few things she had worn.

A few minutes later, Miranda Michaels came out of the small room that 
they 
had taken the girl to. "She's asleep now," she said in a low voice. 
"The 
ambulance should be here any minute to take her to a hospital. No words 
yet," she added with a sad apologetic frown, answering the unspoken 
question 
of her colleague. "But," her expression turned somewhat puzzled, "I did 
find 
something very interesting in her skirt's pocket." She held out her 
hand and 
both men gasped. On her palm lay a USMC Eagle, Globe and Anchor and a 
US 
Meritorious Service Medal.



Dec. 19th, 2002
1726 ZULU
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, VA



"Enter."

Commander Harmon Rabb, Jr. cheerfully opened the door to his partner's 
office and flashed her a trademark flyboy-grin. "Hello Colonel!"

"Harm, hi!" Lieutenant Colonel Sarah Mackenzie's face lit up to a 
genuine 
smile. "Back already?"

Harm closed the door and sat down opposite to her. "Yup. Bud gave the 
Petty 
Officer such a grilling that he practically begged me on his knees to 
cut a 
deal once he was off the stand."

"What did you settle for?" Mac asked, grinning at the mental image of 
someone on his knees before the Almighty Rabb.

"Six months' confinement, forfeiture of pay, dishonorable discharge, 
loss of 
pension. And he gladly took it."

"He'd better." Mac nodded, satisfied. There had been no doubt about 
P.O. 
Marsden's guilt from the start. "So what do you want to do with your 
day, 
flyboy?"

Harm smiled tentatively at his partner. "How about an early lunch?"

Mac found his smile contagious. "Sure, that'd be..."

The telephone interrupted her. Flashing him an apologetic smile, she 
picked 
up the receiver.

"Lieutenant Colonel Mackenzie."

["Good morning, ma'am, this is Deputy Vern Morris, Baltimore Police. We 
might need the Marine Corps's expertise in a case we have here."]

Mac shot Harm a puzzled frown and switched on the speakerphone. "What 
can I 
do for you, Deputy?"

["Well, ma'am, this morning the Lombok Queen, an Indonesian ship, 
docked in 
port. As the crew was unloading the cargo they found a little girl 
onboard. 
She's about ten, badly injured, emaciated, obviously traumatized and 
unable 
to utter a syllable. She's been taken to Union Memorial Hospital. The 
only 
things that could possibly give us a hint as to who she is are a USMC 
Eagle, 
Globe and Anchor and a Meritorious Service Medal.... Uh... Colonel? Are 
you 
still with me? Colonel Mackenzie?"]

Harm felt his heart rate double when he saw Mac blanch. Instantly he 
was at 
her side. Kneeling down beside her and reaching for her hand, he 
quickly 
took over. "Deputy Morris? This is Commander Harmon Rabb. I'm Colonel 
Mackenzie's partner with the Judge Advocate General Corps. We'll both 
meet 
you at Union Memorial as soon as we can."

["I understand. Until later then, Commander."] If the deputy was 
surprised, 
he didn't let it show. Harm quickly told him goodbye and ended the 
connection. Then he turned all his attention to a trembling Mac.

"What's going on, Mac? Tell me," he urged her gently. She could tell he 
was 
trying to keep his concern from showing too openly. But he was failing 
miserably.

Mac's huge dark eyes captured his gaze. Her voice was uneven when she 
spoke. 
"Do you remember the little girl that I told you about, Liliana?"

"The one you had to leave behind in Indonesia after the consulate had 
been 
attacked?"

"Yeah. I gave her my EGA back then, and when I finally tracked her 
down, I 
flew to Indonesia again, remember?"

"Yeah."

"She was at a hospital, recovering from the injuries that she suffered 
when 
she saved us. I gave her my medal. Harm," Mac's voice rang with 
apprehension, "It's got to be her. I've got no clue what she's doing 
here, 
but she'd have only one reason to do this."

Harm reached out and pulled Mac into a tight embrace. "You," he 
whispered, 
shaken. For a few seconds, he held her firmly, feeling her slowly relax 
in 
his arms. Then he drew back and tried to let his gaze convey all the 
strength and reassurance he could possibly muster. "She's going to be 
okay, 
Mac. Listen, I'm finished here anyway. We'll notify the admiral and go 
up to 
Baltimore together. You're in no condition to drive right now." He 
tried a 
slight half-smile.

Her response was a misty smile of her own. "Thanks, Harm," she said, 
her 
voice barely audible, returning his embrace.



Dec. 19th, 2002
1927 ZULU
Union Memorial Hospital
Baltimore, MD



Resting his hand on the small of her back, Harm gently guided Mac to 
the 
reception desk. She had recovered from her initial shock and put up a 
professional Marine façade. Since she didn't object to his touch, he 
just 
let her feel that she wasn't alone in this.

As soon as he caught sight of the two officers, a middle-aged 
African-American in a police officer's uniform approached them. 
"Colonel 
Mackenzie and Commander Rabb?"

The JAG officers only nodded.

"Deputy Vern Morris. We talked earlier on the phone. Thanks for 
coming." His 
smile conveyed a slight uneasiness.

Mac spoke up, guessing what the deputy longed to know but obviously 
didn't 
dare to ask. "Thank you for notifying us, Deputy." A slight smile 
underlined 
her next sentence. "As improbable as it may seem, you called the right 
person. The girl's name is Liliana and it was me who gave her both, the 
insignia and the medal, after an attack on one of our consulates in 
Indonesia where I was deployed earlier this year. I could be mistaken, 
of 
course, but I think that would be highly improbable."

The deputy's jaw literally dropped. "Indeed, it would, ma'am," he said 
very 
slowly, not believing his ears. "So she came for you?"

Mac sighed. "I don't know. My reaction on the phone might have told you 
that 
I was just as surprised to find out about her as you were, Deputy."

Morris risked a half-grin. "That would be correct, ma'am." His grin 
grew as 
he saw Harm and Mac smile back at him.

"How is she?" Mac asked, sobering.

"She's in Intensive Care. No imminent danger, though. The doctors were 
able 
to stabilize her fairly well. Her wounds are not as deep as they seemed 
and 
luckily the burns are only second-degree. As soon as the infection 
diminishes and she gains some strength, she should be able to leave the 
hospital. But she still hasn't uttered a syllable. She must have been 
through something terrible." Morris tried to banish the images of how 
she'd 
looked when they first found her from his mind.

"Can we go see her?" Mac's voice was low.

"I've already informed the staff that a Marine Colonel and a Navy 
Commander 
would probably turn out to be the closest thing to a family she has," 
Morris 
stated. "They told me to tell you to go up as soon as you'd arrived."

Harm shook the deputy's hand. "Thank you very much, Deputy, we're 
indebted 
to you. I guess we might as well take over from here and inform the 
authorities in charge. If you have any further questions, be sure to 
call 
me, no matter what time." He handed the police officer a JAG business 
card.

'Well,' Morris thought, 'They're both lawyers. They'll probably know 
better 
than I what to do with her.' "You're very welcome, Commander. Thank you 
for 
taking care of her. Good luck. Colonel," he nodded to her, turned and 
left.

"You ready to go up there, Marine?" Harm asked gently.

She smiled, grateful for his assistance. "Yeah. Let's go."



Dec. 20th, 2002
0207 ZULU
Union Memorial Hospital
Baltimore, MD



The nurse stopped at the window and quietly observed the three people 
inside 
the small room. The officers had taken off their jackets and were 
sitting at 
the girl's bedside. The man had his arm wrapped around the woman, her 
head 
resting against his shoulder. She was holding the girl's hand. For 
hours 
they had quietly sat there like that. For some reason the nurse felt 
that 
the image reminded her of a Nativity scene. 'Oh, come on, Pam, just 
about 
everything reminds you of Christmas these days. Go and get your work 
done,' 
she scolded herself. But still she couldn't help wiping a tear from her 
cheek as she observed the pair watching over the sleep of a little girl 
they 
barely knew.


Inside the room, all was silent except for the eerie beeping and 
humming of 
the ICU's electronics. Mac stirred in Harm's embrace, then drew back 
and 
smiled at him a little self-consciously. He just smiled back, his 
blue-green 
eyes conveying comfort and confidence. Mac's smile intensified as she 
settled back into her former resting position, closing her eyes and 
exhaling 
slowly.

Suddenly, Harm felt Mac freeze. Both sat up straight and watched as 
Liliana's eyelids began to flutter. Mac got up and leaned over her. 
"Liliana," she called softly, trying not to startle her, "Liliana, it's 
me, 
Mac. You're in America. You found me."

Slowly the girl opened her eyes. Within seconds, Harm and Mac witnessed 
a 
myriad of different emotions wash over her: fear, outright panic, 
despair, 
confusion, recognition and finally overwhelming relief and silent joy. 
Mac 
felt the girl's grip tighten as Liliana's huge black eyes began to fill 
with 
tears. Carefully Mac reached out and pulled her into a tight embrace. 
"I'm 
here, baby," she whispered, "I'm right here. You're safe now. Don't 
worry, 
everything's gonna be okay, I promise."

After a few long moments Mac carefully lowered Liliana onto her pillow 
again 
and turned to Harm who had stood back, granting them a moment to 
themselves. 
Motioning for him to join her, she sat down on the bed and gently 
caressed 
the girl's wet cheek. "Liliana, I want you to meet my partner and best 
friend, Harm," she said with a smile.

Seeing the girl look up at him, Harm warmly smiled back at her. "Hello, 
Liliana," he said softly, "Mac has told me a lot about you. I'm glad we 
meet 
at last." As she smiled, he all of a sudden felt strangely shy.

Mac's expression sobered. "Why did you come here? Can you tell me what 
happened? Where's your mother?" she asked gently.

As soon as the words were out, Harm and Mac saw Liliana's expression 
cloud 
and the panic return to her eyes. Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks 
and she 
began to shake, trying to curl up in a ball on her bed. No sound ever 
escaped her lips, though. Mac immediately took her in her arms again, 
cradling her until her sobs subsided. "Shhh, it's okay. I'm here. It's 
okay, 
my little one. Don't think about it now. You're safe. Try to sleep. We 
won't 
leave," she whispered soothingly, at the same time looking up at Harm, 
helpless. He only placed a firm hand on her shoulder, hoping that his 
presence somehow gave her the strength she would need to stand through 
this.



Dec. 22nd, 2002
2247 ZULU
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, VA



Harm shoved the remaining files to one side of his desk, piling them up 
neatly. They could wait until after Christmas. All the rest of his work 
was 
wrapped up, as were Mac's cases that he had taken over when she had 
decided 
to stay with Liliana. Switching off his computer, he allowed himself a 
sigh 
of content. He had earned his vacation. But as he watched the first 
snowflakes fall from an indigo sky, he couldn't quite convince himself 
to 
let holiday spirit take over. His thoughts kept wandering back to where 
his 
best friend was trying to get a little girl to open up about what she 
had 
been through.

He had stayed with Mac at Liliana's side until the following day when 
the 
admiral had ordered him back to JAG, telling him to finish up Mac's 
most 
urgent assignments. He had been reluctant to leave her as he witnessed 
Mac's 
increasing desperation about the fact that she still couldn't get 
Liliana to 
talk. It had been knowing that wrapping up her cases would be the best 
help 
he could offer that had finally made him go back to D.C. But now he 
longed 
to get to her again and just let her feel that she wasn't alone.

Knowing that because of her position she had been allowed to use her 
cell-phone inside the hospital once the girl had been released from the 
ICU, 
Harm dialed Mac's number.

["Mackenzie."]

"Hi Marine, it's me."

Her voice let show her smile. ["Hey, sailor, good to hear you."] She 
spoke 
low. Obviously the girl was sleeping. Harm involuntarily lowered his 
voice 
as well.

"How are you two girls holding up?"

She sighed. ["Pretty much the same. She doesn't seem to have as many 
nightmares now, though, and sometimes she's even cheerful, but she 
still 
doesn't talk."]

"Are they going to release her anytime soon?"

["Actually, yes. And that's the good part of the story. She's strong 
enough 
to come home with me tomorrow. She'll stay with me for the holidays and 
then 
I'll call the INS."]

Harm hesitated. He had had an idea the other night, something that 
might do 
the little girl good, as well as Mac. "Uhm, Mac," he ventured 
carefully, 
"Might I suggest a slight change of plans?"

She again seemed to smile, curiously this time. ["Go ahead and explain 
yourself, Commander."]

He cleared his throat, feeling uneasy. "Well... I was thinking that a 
big 
city's noises might not be the best thing for Liliana's nerves. She 
should 
spend a couple of days somewhere where it's really quiet, you know?" 
His 
voice's volume lowered just a little bit as he went on. "And maybe 
she's 
more likely to open up in an environment that's just pure peace and 
love." 
He paused, unsure how to go on.

["And you happen to know such a place?"] Mac asked, although she 
already had 
a suspicion about what he had in mind.

"Yeah, in fact I do. Mac, I was going up to Grandma Sarah's for the 
holidays. Just to enjoy the calm, the good food and - hopefully - the 
snow. 
You know, decorating a Christmas tree, roasting marshmallows over the 
fireplace... that kind of thing. Might be just the break your little 
one 
needs." 'And you, too,' he silently added before continuing, "How about 
I 
come pick you up tomorrow morning, we get Liliana some clothes, and 
then we 
spend a week up in Beallsville?" Harm asked, hoping she wouldn't hear 
his 
heart pound.

Her voice seemed just a little uneven when she softly answered. ["I 
think 
Liliana would love that,"] she said, adding hesitatingly, ["And so 
would 
I."]

Harm felt a goofy smile spread over his face. "I'm glad you think so. 
Grandma tells me to say hello, by the way, and she can't wait to get to 
know 
you."

["Same here. So when will you pick us up?"]

"Say, 1000 sharp?"

["As sharp as you can manage, flyboy,"] she replied, obviously 
smirking.

He chuckled. "Hold your tongue, Marine, or I won't bring any warm 
things for 
you. Okay, see you girls tomorrow then. Uh, Mac?"

["Yeah?"]

"I'm really glad you're coming."

He just loved hearing her smile. ["Thank you so much for asking, 
Harm."]

"You're welcome. Good night, Marine. Sleep tight."

["You, too,"] she answered softly before ending the connection.

Harm slowly put the receiver down, stood up, and walked over to the 
window. 
Slight snowfall had set in, nothing to worry about if it didn't 
intensify 
over night. He watched as the light in the courtyard slowly turned 
milky-white, and a feeling of utmost peace began to grow inside him. 
Maybe, 
up at Grandma Sarah's, a terrorized child and two people who normally 
dreaded Christmastime would get a chance to learn what God's message 
was 
about.



Dec. 23rd, 2002
1432 ZULU
Union Memorial Hospital
Baltimore, MD



"Good morning, Liliana," Mac gleefully greeted the little girl as she 
entered the room. "Are you ready to leave this place?"

The girl looked up at her, and a radiant smile spread over her face as 
she 
nodded eagerly.

"Do you want to know where we're going?"

Again the girl nodded, taking Mac's hand as soon as she sat down at her 
bedside.

"Well," Mac smiled enigmatically, "Do you know what day tomorrow is?"

Liliana's brow furrowed as she seemed to think. Then she sadly shook 
her 
head.

"Tomorrow is Christmas Eve," Mac told her, and her heart jumped when 
she saw 
the girl's face light up. But as quickly as the smile had come, it went 
away 
and the haunted sadness took over again.

Mac with her free hand gently caressed Liliana's cheek, understanding. 
"You 
want to be with your mother for Christmas, don't you?" she asked 
softly.

The girl nodded, a tear making its way down her cheek.

Mac took a deep breath. She felt she had to know at least that part of 
the 
story. "Liliana," she ventured carefully and very gently, "Is your 
mommy in 
heaven?"

Sobbing slightly, the girl nodded. Mac found her suspicions proven 
right. 
This was at least a part of the child's trauma. Maybe she had even seen 
her 
mother die. But they could figure that out later. For now, knowing that 
the 
little girl was an orphan was enough. Mac leaned over and drew her into 
a 
tight embrace, feeling the child relax after a few minutes. She then 
gently 
lowered her back on the pillow.

"Liliana," she began to explain, "Harm, you remember, my best 
friend..."

The girl nodded, smiling slightly.

"...well, Harm had a wonderful idea the other day. Harm has a very kind 
grandmother, you know," Mac went on in a 'fairy-tale' voice, "And is 
going 
to see her today and stay there for the Christmas holidays. Harm's 
grandma 
is called Sarah, like me," she added, seeing Liliana's smile intensify. 
Encouraged, she went on. "Oh, and Harm's real name is Harmon, Harmon 
Rabb, 
just in case you were wondering about his strange name. He's a 
commander in 
the navy." Liliana's smile had by now grown to a real one, and she 
seemed 
eager for Mac to go on. Mac instantly complied. "Anyway, Harm's grandma 
lives on a farm, far away from the big cities and the noise. Even the 
next 
village is a few miles away. I've never been there, but Harm tells me 
that 
it's really beautiful where she lives. There are hills and woods, and 
right 
now there might be quite a lot of snow. Have you ever seen what snow 
looks 
like?" Mac knew well that Liliana hadn't, but she asked nevertheless.

Liliana shook her head 'no', obviously curious.

"It's rain that high up in the air, where it's very cold, freezes to 
tiny, 
tiny crystals and falls down, covering the whole world with a fluffy 
white 
blanket. It is really beautiful. There's even a little snow in the 
streets 
today but in the big cities it just isn't the same. Would you like to 
see 
what it looks like out where Harm's grandma lives?"

Liliana nodded eagerly, a hopeful smile making her eyes sparkle.

"Well," Mac drawled, smiling, wanting to create a little suspense, 
"Then 
maybe I should tell you that in thirteen minutes - if he's on time, 
that is 
- Harm will come and pick us up from here. First, we'll go into town 
and buy 
you some warm clothes, and then, you, me, and Harm, we'll all go up in 
the 
hills and stay with his grandma for Christmas. What do you say?"

A sharp intake of breath and a huge radiant beam were her answer. 
Liliana 
opened her arms, and Mac gladly let herself be hugged, feeling the 
little 
girl's joy touch something inside her.

"So, little lady," Mac then said in a matter-of-fact tone, "Let me 
braid 
your hair, and let's get you dressed. I brought you a few things that 
might 
fit. But if they don't, don't worry. We'll buy you new things anyway, 
okay?"

Liliana nodded and let Mac comb and braid her hair into an orderly 
French 
braid.



Dec. 23rd, 2002
1847 ZULU
JC Penney's
Baltimore, MD



Liliana stared into the mirror and didn't seem to recognize herself. 
She was 
wearing blue jeans, brown mountain boots with laces, a beautiful 
dark-red 
and white Norwegian turtleneck sweater and a white anorak with fur 
around 
the hood, not to mention the matching gloves, scarf and earmuffs. Harm 
and 
Mac watched, smiling, as the little girl looked herself over and over 
again, 
obviously thinking that one person couldn't possibly own as many 
clothes as 
had been bought for her today. Harm and Mac hadn't had the slightest 
intention of spoiling her, but first, they had seen to it that Liliana 
had a 
basic wardrobe to chose from. Then, they had just browsed around a bit, 
enjoying themselves immensely. The girl looked so adorable in just 
about 
everything they had picked that they felt they couldn't put the things 
back. 
Heck, it was Christmas, the girl had just been through hell and back, 
and 
nobody knew exactly for how long she would stay in the States. So why 
not 
spoil her a little bit?

Harm knelt down beside Liliana and met her glance in the mirror, 
smiling. 
"You know what you look like, Lily?" he asked her, pointing his finger 
at 
the reflection. The girl shook her head, a surprised smile indicating 
that 
she seemed to like the nickname that Harm had just called her.

"You look like a girl from one of the native peoples that live up far 
north 
where there's ice and snow throughout most time of the year," he 
explained. 
"People used to call them 'Eskimos' but they don't like that because, 
in 
their language, it means 'Those who eat raw meat'. You wouldn't like to 
be 
called that, now, would you?"

Smiling frowningly, the girl shook her head.

"Those people call themselves 'Inuit' instead. In their language, 
that's 
just 'the people'. Beautiful, isn't it?"

Liliana nodded. Mac watched the exchange between her two friends with 
emotion rising fast inside her. How on earth did Harm always seem to 
know 
just how to talk to kids? If anyone would be able to get her to talk 
again, 
she was sure it would be him, and it made her immensely proud.

Harm stood and put a hand on Liliana's shoulder. "So, are you ready to 
face 
ice and snow, Lily the Inuit?" he asked her with a grin.

It was then that Harm got his first radiant beam from her; the sparkle 
in 
Liliana's black eyes reminded him very much of the sparkle he had so 
many 
times detected in another pair of huge dark eyes that were dear to him. 
Suddenly he again felt that strange shyness within him as Liliana put 
her 
small hand in his and dragged him over to where Mac was standing. 
Harm's 
glance met with Mac's, and in his blue-green eyes, she read something 
that, 
most likely, she would have described as a mixture of frightened awe 
and 
joy.



Dec. 23rd, 2002
2311 ZULU
Rabb Farm
Outside Beallsville, PA



It was already dark when Harm finally steered his SUV in front of the 
white 
old-fashioned farmhouse and stepped on the brakes. Mac, who had chosen 
to 
sit in the back next to Liliana, gently shook the girl, who had fallen 
asleep during the long ride. Harm cast a glance in the rear mirror and 
caught Mac's smile. He was almost sorry to break the spell now. They 
had 
ridden in silence, almost all the time since Liliana had drifted off, 
leaning against Mac's shoulder. The farther up in the hills they got, 
the 
more snow piled up high along the roadside, making the tree branches 
hang 
low with the weight. Around sunset the weather had cleared, and the sky 
had 
changed color ever so slightly, the soft light reflecting on the 
sparkling 
fresh snow. It was a pastel-colored reminder of what a summer sunset 
could 
be, enchanting both of them. Neither had felt inclined to break the 
silence. 
Now and then they had exchanged a smile in the rear mirror, enjoying 
each 
other's quiet company and allowing the season's peace to fill their 
minds.

With a sigh, Harm opened the door and got out of the car, stretching 
his 6'4 
frame. Mac gently helped Liliana out of the car, and the girl's eyes 
immediately went wide with surprise at the scenery, which looked as if 
it 
were thickly covered with the icing of one of her mother's cakes. All 
three 
turned their heads when they heard a door creaking. A woman, 
approximately a 
head shorter than Mac, came walking towards them from the house.

Mac felt her stomach tighten slightly. She hadn't yet met any of Harm's 
family, and although she kept asking herself just why it mattered that 
much 
to her if his grandmother would like her, she felt her smile take on a 
decidedly self-conscious nuance.

"Harmon!" the woman exclaimed, immediately drawing him into a tight 
bear hug 
although her eyes were only about the same level as his gold wings 
would 
have been had he been in uniform. Mac observed her closely. She had to 
be in 
her mid-eighties, she estimated. She was slender and wore blue jeans 
and a 
lumberjack shirt that stood in stark contrast to the old-fashioned bun 
that 
she kept her white hair pinned up in. She seemed resolute and strong 
and yet 
fragile at the same time. But what startled Mac, in spite of the 
darkness, 
were her eyes - the very same ones that she was always in danger of 
losing 
herself in when looking at her partner.

"Hi Gram," Harm said in a low, happy voice that held a 
'Finally-I'm-home' 
undertone Mac had never heard in all the years that she'd known him. 
Somehow 
this made her fear grow. She subconsciously stepped closer to the awed 
Liliana and put her arm around her shoulders.

"It's been too long, boy," his grandmother mockingly scolded Harm as 
she 
drew back. "But," her smile returned, "You can make up for it and 
present 
your girls." With that she turned to Mac and Liliana, her warm smile 
starting to make Mac's fear dissipate.

Harm's grin was almost proud as he stepped over and, without thinking, 
put 
his arm around Mac, making her jump slightly. "Gram, this is Mac. And 
this 
is Liliana," he added casting the girl a smile and at once getting one 
in 
return.

Sarah Rabb took in the scene, silently taking note of the feelings 
displayed 
on each party's faces. 'Promising start,' she contently stated to 
herself 
before approaching her grandson's company.

"Mac, Liliana," Harm turned to 'his' girls, "This is my Grandma Sarah."

"I'm very pleased to meet you, ma'am. Harm's told me a lot about you," 
Mac 
greeted her shyly as she shook the old woman's hand.

"The pleasure's all mine, dear," Grandma Sarah answered, "You are all 
my 
grandson ever talks about." That remark somehow made Harm study his 
feet. 
Mac cleared her throat in confusion, and Liliana smiled broadly at the 
old 
woman. Grandma Sarah returned the grin and winked, then looked back up 
and 
again met Mac's glance. "And, please, don't call me ma'am. Everyone 
calls me 
Gram." She smiled kindly at the younger woman, who was obviously still 
a 
little embarrassed.

Mac found the old woman's smile contagious. It was different from 
Harm's, to 
be sure, but the eyes were the same, and she at once felt very much at 
home. 
Smiling herself, she answered. "Okay... Gram. You can call me Sarah if 
you 
like."

Harm's head immediately turned in her direction, a puzzled expression 
on his 
face. He had never heard Mac invite anyone to call her Sarah of her own 
free 
will. Grandma Sarah sensed the tension and decided to step in. 'Good 
Lord, 
if all of their six years were like that, I'm amazed that JAG hasn't 
burnt 
down yet from all the sparks that fly between them,' she mused, 
inwardly 
chuckling. Bending down to the girl, Grandma Sarah extended her hand to 
Liliana who shyly took it. "Hi Liliana, it's nice to meet you."

The girl actually curtsied, making Harm and Mac stifle grins. Grandma 
Sarah 
put her hands on her hips in mock indignation. "Upon my word, this 
isn't 
Buckingham Palace, my dear. Let me show you how we greet each other 
properly 
out here." With those words she swept the girl into a tight hug and 
after a 
few seconds felt her return it. "That's better," Grandma Sarah stated 
with a 
content nod. "And you, too, call me Gram, okay?" she added, ignoring 
that 
the girl hadn't said a word yet.

Liliana smiled at her and then, very low, answered. "Call me Lily."

Harm felt Mac grab his hand and returned the squeeze. Trying to hide 
his own 
inner turmoil that he felt at hearing the girl's clear voice and sweet 
Asian 
accent, he reassuringly whispered: "I told you it would do her good. I 
don't 
know how she does it but Gram works miracles."

Mac looked up at him with a misty smile, remembering his exchange with 
the 
girl in front of the mirror. "In fact, I think you do know, Harm," she 
replied softly.



Dec. 24th, 2002
0203 ZULU
Rabb Farm
Outside Beallsville, PA



The night had turned crisply cold and the stars shone beautifully above 
the 
clearing the farmhouse stood on, surrounded by woods. All was deeply 
snowed 
in; the ice crystals sparkled in the moonlight. Harm zipped up his 
anorak 
and cautiously stepped up to the little figure that was silently 
sitting on 
the steps that led up to the front porch.

Liliana turned her head and smiled, which Harm took as an invitation to 
join 
her. She still didn't speak very much, but he and Mac felt very much 
inclined to take her few words for more than they had ever expected for 
today. "Hi," he simply said. She only smiled back.

"It's time for bed, you know, Lily," Harm carefully began, only to find 
himself immediately wrapped around her finger as she turned her 
pleading 
eyes up to him. 'Oh my, this could get interesting if I ever have 
kids,' he 
inwardly groaned. "Okay, we'll stay another ten minutes, but then we go 
in. 
Deal?" he asked, silently imploring her not to use that puppy-dog look 
again. Thankfully she didn't but simply acknowledged with a smiling 
nod.

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, taking in the beauty and 
the 
peace of their surroundings. Then Liliana looked up at the stars. 
"She's up 
there," she murmured.

Harm looked at her. "Who, your mommy?"

She nodded, never taking her eyes from the sky.

"My daddy is up there, too," Harm said softly, following the direction 
of 
her gaze, knowing that she'd probably look at him right now.

"Your daddy?"

Harm lowered his glance to face Liliana's huge black eyes. "Yes. He 
died 
when I was six years old. His plane was shot down. On Christmas Eve," 
he 
added very low, more to himself than to her, realizing he would miss 
his 
encounter with his father at the Wall this year. Strange that he hadn't 
thought about it earlier.

"I'm ten."

"Then you're a big girl, Lily."

"No." Her voice was very low and sad. He sensed that he had touched a 
nerve.

"You mean, you weren't big enough to help your mommy?" he tried 
carefully.

Starting to sniffle a little, she nodded. Harm put an arm around her 
and 
pulled her close. "For a long time, I didn't know what happened to my 
dad," 
he told her, "And I always tried to find out. I was thirty-four when I 
finally learned that he was dead. I had always thought that I could 
have 
helped him, but that wasn't true. Sometimes things happen, and we can't 
do 
anything about it. So, do you know what I do now instead of thinking 
what 
if?"

Liliana earnestly looked at him and waited.

"I try to protect those that I care about most. Because that's a thing 
that 
I actually can do something about," he explained.

"Like Mac?"

He grinned, looking down, just a little embarrassed. 'Kids. Just wait a 
little and they'll surely figure you out.' "Yeah, for example. I 
wouldn't 
want anything to happen to her. But you, too, Lily," he added, looking 
up 
again, "And Gram."

"How?"

"Oh, you can do a lot of things. I'm in the military, so I protect and 
defend our country. And I'm a lawyer - that means I protect and defend 
what's right. And I'm a friend. So I always try to be there when my 
friends 
need me."

Liliana looked at him, a little lost. "What can I do?"

"For Mac?" Harm asked.

"Huh humm."

"You could pray and ask God to watch out for her. You could ask him to 
send 
her an angel."

"You can't see angels," she stated sadly.

"Yes, you can," he answered, earning himself a surprised glance. "Come 
on, 
I'll show you."

Harm stood up and took Liliana's hand. Together they descended the 
steps and 
walked a few feet away from the house, into the virgin snow. "Watch 
me," 
Harm told the girl as he lay down on his back in the snow as if 
standing at 
attention. He then slowly moved his outstretched arms up sideways until 
they 
met over his head and brought them down again, repeating the whole 
movement 
over and over. Then he carefully opened and closed his outstretched 
legs 
several times. Finally he got up and cautiously stepped out of the 
picture 
he had painted in the snow. "What do you see, Lily?" he gently asked 
her, 
brushing the snow off his sleeves.

"An angel," she whispered in awe. Then she went off a few yards and lay 
down 
herself. Repeating the same movements that Harm had just shown her, she 
drew 
another little angel in the snow. Getting up, she took a few steps in 
the 
direction of the house and lay down again. Always nearing the house, 
Liliana 
drew ever more angels in the snow until she reached the porch. Harm 
followed 
close by.

On the porch they were greeted by Mac, who had come out to usher them 
inside 
but had stopped short and watched them instead. Liliana stepped up to 
her 
with a content smile. "Now you are safe," she simply stated and went 
inside.

"She called an army of angels to protect you, Mac," Harm explained in a 
somewhat shaky voice.

"I know," she replied, embracing him tightly. "But I feel I need no one 
else 
to look after me as long as you're close by."



Dec. 24th, 2002
1423 ZULU
Rabb Farm
Outside Beallsville, PA



Grandma Sarah got up from the breakfast table and picked up her and 
Liliana's plates. The girl hadn't eaten very much, but the adults could 
see 
that her appetite was growing, as were her spirits. Her bruises and 
burns 
were still visible but healing fast. Sarah Rabb was anxious to include 
her 
in the holiday routine as much as possible to make her forget about her 
physical pain. "Would you please help me with the dishes, Lily?" she 
asked 
with a kind smile.

As soon as Grandma Sarah had learned that Liliana's mother had been a 
cook, 
she had understood that the kitchen would be where the girl would 
probably 
feel most at home. So, starting with yesterday's delicious dinner, the 
foursome had taken up the routine of washing up together and had 
transferred 
their conversation and their meals to the kitchen as well. Mac found 
that 
the huge old-fashioned, oak furnished kitchen was the coziest place in 
the 
whole house anyway so she didn't mind.

Liliana complied with a smile and followed Grandma Sarah to the sink, 
carrying both their mugs. Harm stored the groceries in the refrigerator 
while Mac put away the remaining dishes and cleaned the table. 
Strangely, 
with Grandma Sarah in charge, joint ventures in housework didn't even 
need a 
battle plan. They just came up naturally.

"Do you want to know what we're gonna do today?" Grandma Sarah asked 
the 
girl as she handed her a kitchen towel. Lily nodded. "It's Christmas 
Eve, so 
we'll clean the house all over this morning," Harm's grandmother 
announced 
with a smile. Low groans were heard from the two officers.

"I thought you got us up here to relax, flyboy," Mac commented with 
upraised 
eyebrows.

"So did I..." Harm countered with a theatrical frown, peeping in 
Grandma 
Sarah's direction.

The old woman with a mock frown put her hands to her hips - obviously 
her 
favorite gesture, Mac noted. "Lily, look at those two," she began to 
scold, 
the hint of a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "They want to 
defend our country and are too weak to sweep the floor or dust the 
shelves. 
Pathetic, isn't it?"

Liliana openly grinned at Harm and Mac and nodded. "Yes. And lazy," she 
added.

"Hey," Mac protested, laughing, "Where's your loyalty, Liliana? You 
remember? I explained that to you in the hospital, when I gave you the 
medal. Loyal people always help their friends."

The girl's smile broadened. "I remember loyalty. And valor. I have 
that, 
too. That's what the medal says. So I help Gram."

Harm couldn't stifle his chuckles. Taking up his hands in defense he 
walked 
up to Liliana. "All right, you win, Lily. So, as to our punishment, 
it's up 
to you to decide what part of the housework Mac and I have to do. 
Okay?" He 
motioned for Mac to come over and together they knelt before the girl 
like 
prisoners ready to hear their verdict, eyes fixed on the floor, 
frantically 
biting their lips to refrain from laughing.

Liliana exchanged a smile with Grandma Sarah who winked at her and put 
her 
finger to her lips. Then she tiptoed over to the door and waved for the 
girl 
to follow her. Harm and Mac were so desperately trying to keep their 
countenance that they didn't hear when the girl, catlike, snuck out of 
the 
room, too.

"Hey, Lily, so what did you decide for your prisoners' fates?" Harm 
finally 
asked as the silence began to stretch. A faint clicking from the 
direction 
of the door was his answer. He and Mac looked up in confusion and found 
themselves alone in the big room.

"What the..." Harm quickly got up on his feet and with a few quick 
strides 
reached the door and tried the handle. "Uhm, Mac..." he drawled, a 
little 
dumbfounded.

"What's up, sailor? You look as if you'd just been stood up by your 
girlfriend." She grinned, curious.

"They locked us in."

Mac's eyes became round. "You're kidding."

"Nope."

"Then pick the lock."

"Uhm, this is really embarrassing, but... I can't. I'm sorry." Harm was 
actually blushing.

Mac crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Care to explain?"

He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. "Uh, you know, Mac... 
I... 
used to lock myself in the kitchen when I was little... at night, you 
know, 
to... well..."

A grin slowly spread over Mac's features. "To look for sweets. I see."

"Well, not exactly..."

"What then?"

Harm sighed, his embarrassment still rising. "Gram used to hide my 
Christmas 
presents in the kitchen closet," he confessed with a half-grin. "One 
day she 
found out that I went looking for them and she had a locksmith come and 
close the lock from the kitchen's side so no one could shut her out 
anymore. 
See?" He indicated the point in question.

"Uh huh..." Mac's grin widened even more as she saw Harm squirm under 
her 
scrutiny.

"So Gram just locked the kitchen door from outside and now we're stuck 
in 
here. The windows only open a few inches, to prevent any farm cats from 
entering." Harm didn't know where to look.

Mac glanced outside, only to find Grandma Sarah and Liliana grinning at 
her, 
both in their anoraks, shopping baskets in their hands.

"We won't be away for long. Get the kitchen done and enjoy yourselves," 
Grandma Sarah called, winking. Then she took Liliana's hand and the 
pair 
walked off.

Sighing, Mac went over to the closet and took out two aprons, tossing 
one to 
Harm. "Well, at least they finished the dishes. So I guess we'd better 
get 
started. Get the scrubbing brush and the bucket, will you?"

"Why me?" he asked with an overly hurt look on his face.

"You wouldn't really want me to pull rank, squid," she threatened, 
grinning.

"Sue me for DDO, jarhead," he challenged her, turning around to get 
himself 
a coke from the fridge. Right then something wet hit him on the back of 
his 
neck.

"Ugh!" He jumped and grabbed for the object, a sponge thoroughly soaked 
with 
dishwashing water. Weighing it in his hand, he slowly turned around and 
cast 
his partner a threatening smile. "Okay, we're at war then. Duck!" he 
called 
and in the same moment threw the sponge back in her direction. Mac dove 
for 
shelter and it hit one of the cupboards.

"Ha!" Harm exclaimed with a triumphant grin, pointing his finger at 
her. "I 
said 'duck' and you did! So much for jarheads never ducking..."

He didn't get any further as said sponge hit him full force on the 
cheek, 
splashing the soapy water all over his mouth and nose. He glared at her 
as 
he wiped his face with his sleeve. 'Just you wait, Marine...' he 
silently 
swore.

Hearing Mac laugh merrily at his expense, Harm grabbed the sponge and 
was at 
her side in no time. She let out a very un-Marine-like squeal and 
quickly 
rounded the kitchen table. Harm followed her, laughing, and 
unexpectedly 
reversed his running direction. Mac almost instantly became aware of 
the 
change but the table wasn't big enough to give her time to react. She 
bumped 
into him, and he immediately caught her and held her tight with one arm 
while with the other hand he thoroughly wiped her face with the sponge. 
Mac 
yelped and tried to wriggle out of his grip, laughing, but he was 
determined 
not to let her off the hook.

"Do you admit that you started it?" he asked her with raised eyebrows, 
still 
trying to keep her in check, gasping a little because she was stronger 
than 
he would have liked to admit.

"You... mmmphff.... wouldn't listen... mpfffmmm," she managed to get 
out, 
fighting his sponge attack, unable to contain her chuckles.

"Why don't you just shut up and admit that you started it?" he 
challenged, 
continuing to wipe her face with the sponge.

"Shut up? Try... mmpmmmmf... and make me!" she shot back, her eyes 
sparkling.

"Okay!" Without thinking he tossed away the sponge and tightly wrapped 
both 
arms around her, pressing his lips to hers in a long, passionate kiss.

As soon as they parted for air, realization set in about what had just 
happened. Panting, Harm rested his forehead on hers, eyes closed, still 
holding her tight. They stayed immobile for a few moments, both trying 
to 
come to terms with the wave of conflicting emotions that threatened to 
sweep 
them away. Harm eventually opened his eyes and found Mac looking at 
him. He 
tried half a flyboy-grin and got an equally embarrassed smile in 
return. 
"Let's clean the kitchen," he whispered.

"Yeah," she acknowledged, glad to have something earthly to concentrate 
on.



Dec. 24th, 2002
2123 ZULU
Rabb Farm
Outside Beallsville, PA



"Wait... wait... not yet, I have to secure the screws first," Harm 
panted as 
he was applying all his strength to the particularly reluctant tree 
stand.

"Harm, this tree's too big, I can't hold it up any longer," Mac choked 
out 
through gritted teeth.

"Hang on, Marine, I'm almost..." he groaned, giving the third screw one 
last 
fierce turn, "Done. Phew. Okay," he stepped over to her, "Let's get 
this 
thing up."

Three minutes later a beautiful pine tree, seven feet high, stood in 
the 
living-room, just far enough from the fireplace not to be endangered by 
flying sparks. Together, Harm and Mac admired their work. While Gram 
and 
Liliana had cleaned the rest of the house, they had gone off into the 
woods 
and had procured them a beautiful specimen, slender and even in growth, 
an 
ideal Christmas tree.

"Okay, Gram, Lily, your turn," Mac called.

The old woman and the girl entered the room, both carrying cardboard 
boxes 
full of decoration items. Liliana stepped up to Mac. "You must go," she 
said 
decidedly.

Mac smiled at her. "Yeah, I know. Harm and I will retreat to the porch 
and 
enjoy the last sunrays, so you can do your work and we won't see a 
thing."

"Wonderful." Liliana beamed at her.

"Let's go, sailor," Mac called her friend, "We're surplus to 
requirements 
here."

Chuckling slightly, Harm zipped up his anorak and put his hand on the 
small 
of her back, leading her outside.


"So, what do we start with?" Grandma Sarah asked the girl.

Liliana searched through the boxes and decided on a long red garland. 
"This 
and candles."

"You're right, we need to attach the lights first." Grandma Sarah 
showed the 
girl how to clip them on the branches and each busied herself with one 
string of lights, Sarah on the ladder, Liliana down on the floor. After 
a 
few moments of silence the girl spoke up.

"I like Harm."

Grandma Sarah smiled. "I'm glad you do, Lily. What makes you like him?"

"Mac likes him."

Suppressing a chuckle, Grandma Sarah went on. "Do you think so?"

Liliana grinned. "I see it."

"What?"

"She looks funny when she looks at him."

Grandma Sarah bit her lip. "And that makes you think she likes him?"

"Yes," Liliana said earnestly. "She never looks at other people like 
she 
looks at Harm."

"You're a keen observer, Lily," Grandma Sarah told her. "Do you know 
what 
love is?"

"Yes," the girl answered eagerly. "It's when you say to someone that he 
must 
never go away. And then you have a family."

Again, Sarah Rabb found it hard not to laugh. "In a way..." she 
conceded. 
"But there's more. People who love each other do each other good, you 
know," 
she explained. "But it also means that they can be hurt more easily 
because 
they open up to one another and tell each other what they feel, deep 
inside."

"Wonderful," the girl said in a dreamy voice.

"Yes, that's a wonderful thing," Grandma Sarah admitted, "But some 
people 
are so scared of getting hurt that they will never tell each other that 
they're in love. Like Harm and Mac."

Liliana looked at her, surprised. "They are afraid?"

"Yes, Lily, very much - both of them. They have been hurt by others and 
don't want to get hurt again."

"But they must be together." From the mouth of a child it sounded so 
easy.

Grandma Sarah sighed as she began to place the red garland on the 
tree's 
branches. "I think so, too. But they have to tell each other how they 
feel. 
And they haven't really done that over six years that they've been 
working 
together."

"So long?"

"Yes, my dear. So long."

"I could tell them. So they won't need to be afraid."

Sarah chuckled. "That's very kind of you. But love doesn't work that 
way. 
They have to do it by themselves. But you can pray that they do."

Liliana picked up a box of red wooden apples and handed it to Grandma 
Sarah. 
"I will draw angels for them tonight. Out in the snow. So they are safe 
and 
can tell each other."

Smiling, Sarah Rabb accepted the box. "Do that, Lily. They may need 
your 
help with this."



Same time
Front Porch
Rabb Farm
Outside Beallsville, PA



Mac and Harm had settled down on the front porch swing, cuddled up 
close to 
each other - to share body heat, of course - and silently watched yet 
another pastel colored winter sunset. Neither one dared to touch the 
topic 
of what had happened in the kitchen earlier that day, fearing that once 
the 
issue came up it might threaten their renewed close friendship. But 
deep in 
their hearts both knew that it would only be a matter of time until 
they 
would have to deal with what lay beneath the surface.

"You know, Mac," Harm softly spoke up, "You should think about what 
you'll 
tell family services and the INS."

She sighed, closing her eyes as she rested her head on his shoulder. "I 
can 
always tell them that I wanted Liliana to recover from her injuries 
first. 
And that she was released to my custody for the time being." Mac 
carefully 
avoided the other half of what Harm's question had implied.

But he wouldn't let her back away now. "You know that's not what I 
meant."

"Yeah, I know."

"Have you ever thought about what you'll do about her?" he ventured 
cautiously.

Again she sighed. "Not really." She lifted her head and looked directly 
into 
Harm's blue-green eyes. "I didn't want to think about sending her back 
to 
Indonesia," she admitted softly.

"I guessed as much," came his guarded reply. Taking a deep breath, he 
decided to ask her what had been troubling him from the start. "So you 
want 
to keep her?"

The shadow of a far-away smile crossed Mac's features. "Yeah, I guess I 
do. 
She's such a treasure."

"That she is," he softly agreed with a smile. "But," he added, 
sobering, 
"Does she have any living relatives in Indonesia?"

"I don't know," Mac answered, her voice just a little sad. "It's likely 
that 
she has, though. Harm, first of all we need to know what happened to 
her. 
Without her story I have no case to argue in my favor."

"Do you think she would like to stay with you?" he asked.

"Do you think she would travel all around the world on her own just to 
find 
me if she wouldn't?" she countered with a wry smile.

She felt his chest move as he chuckled softly. "I see your point, 
counselor. 
So I understand that your mind's already pretty much made up about 
this," he 
stated, his voice neutral.

"I think so, yeah," she admitted with an embarrassed laugh.

Swallowing hard, Harm took a deep breath, making Mac again look up at 
him, 
slightly puzzled. Her confusion grew as he averted his eyes and instead 
took 
her hand in his, studying the smooth skin on its back. "Would you let 
me in 
on this, Mac?" he asked in a low voice, not daring to face her.

Mac felt her stomach tighten. "What do you mean?" she whispered.

Harm cleared his throat and willed himself to look up. He felt Mac 
start to 
tremble ever so slightly, subconsciously tightening the grip of her 
hand. "I 
would love to be a part of your little family, Mac," he confessed. "May 
I?"

Mac searched his expression and in his eyes found the answer to her yet 
unspoken question. All of a sudden, a warm dizziness spread throughout 
her 
body and she felt her tears rise. Yet, she had to make sure that his 
question really was what she had taken it for. There was too much at 
stake. 
And she was scared. So scared.

"Harm," she spoke up, her voice uneven, "Do you ask because of Liliana 
or 
because of me? Of... you and me?" she forced herself to add.

'Oh, please, Hammer, don't screw it up this time,' Harm implored 
himself. He 
looked down to where his thumb was still caressing the back of Mac's 
hand. 
"I..."

He didn't get to answer. Down at the village someone obviously tested 
the 
firecrackers he had bought for New Year. A series of clearly audible 
explosions could be heard, even up on the hill at the Rabbs' farm.

It was then that an earth-shattering scream came from inside the 
farmhouse, 
immediately followed by violent sobbing.

"Lily." They had said it together. In the fraction of a second they 
were on 
their feet and stormed inside, only to find their little girl curled up 
in a 
fetal position on the floor, crying her eyes out in the arms of an 
utterly 
helpless Grandma Sarah.



Dec. 24th, 2002
2206 ZULU
Inside the farmhouse
Rabb Farm
Outside Beallsville, PA



"Lily, baby, what is it?" Mac threw her jacket on the couch and dropped 
to 
her knees at Grandma Sarah's side, taking the shaking girl from her and 
cradling her soothingly. Liliana's face was ashen, and as she looked 
up, Mac 
could see that the haunted look in her eyes had tripled in intensity. 
In a 
low voice she repeated a few Indonesian words over and over again, 
sobbing. 
Harm and Grandma Sarah sat down on the couch, granting Mac and 'her' 
girl as 
much privacy as they could without leaving them alone.

"Baby, I don't understand your language," Mac softly tried to reach the 
girl's mind with her words. But Liliana only cried on, her bottomless 
fear 
and grief tearing at Mac's heart. She silently looked up at Harm who 
had 
paled a little himself. Nevertheless, he tried to pass some strength on 
to 
her by blowing her a gentle kiss and smiling encouragement. Mac felt 
her 
courage rise ever so slightly and cast him back a teary but thankful 
smile 
of her own.

Several minutes later, Liliana's sobs had quieted down. Never ceasing 
to 
caress her, Mac tried again. "Lily, it's me, Mac. Talk to me. Please." 
Her 
voice took up a new tone, very warm and comforting. Harm subconsciously 
grabbed his grandmother's hand, receiving a knowing smile that wasn't 
entirely steady as well.

"Mac..." Lily sobbed as she recognized her surroundings, tightly 
holding on 
to her friend.

Trying to steady her voice, Mac took the plunge. "The fireworks 
reminded you 
of something, didn't they? Was there an explosion, back in Indonesia?"

Fresh tears welled up in Liliana's eyes. She could only manage to nod 
but 
refrained from erupting into sobs again.

"Where was it, Lily?"

"Bali," the girl choked out, barely audible. Mac's head shot up and her 
eyes 
met Harm's as understanding dawned - the terrible terrorist attack in 
the 
tourist village of Kuta. At least 189 people had died on October 12th 
when 
Muslim extremists had placed a bomb in a downtown bar - and installed a 
second bomb, ready to explode immediately after, in the very direction 
where 
the survivors had been most likely to run. From what Mac remembered of 
the 
news coverage, it must have been hell on earth.

"Oh my God..." she only whispered, pulling the girl tight into her arms 
again. A few minutes later Mac forced herself to go on with the 
questioning. 
"But when we met you were living in the province of Aceh.  That's in 
northern Sumatra. That's thousands of miles away from Bali. How did you 
get 
there?" she asked gently.

Sniffling and obviously trying to recover her composure, Liliana tried 
to 
sit up. Mac made her lean against her, wrapping her firmly in her arms. 
The 
girl cleared her throat. "When the consulate wasn't reopened," her 
voice was 
low but clear, "My mother decided that she had to get a new job. We 
have no 
family. And in Aceh it's getting dangerous. Muslims and Christians are 
fighting all the time. But they always need cooks where the tourists 
go. So 
we moved to Bali." A few sobs made her interrupt her narrative.

"So, did your mother find a job?" Mac softly urged Liliana to go on. 
The 
girl needed to keep talking, to let everything out.

"Yes, she was the cook in a downtown bar called Sari Club in Kuta."

Again, Harm, Mac and Grandma Sarah exchanged horrified looks, a 
dreadful 
image beginning to unfold in their minds.

"Was she..." Mac's voice faltered. She cleared her throat and tried 
again. 
"Was she at work when the explosion occurred?"

Liliana's mouth began to twitch violently. She tried to fight her tears 
but 
failed. Mac rocked her back and forth in her arms, granting her all the 
time 
she needed to cope with the horrifying memories. Against Mac's chest, 
Liliana nodded 'yes' to Mac's last question.

When the sobs had somewhat subsided, Mac simply asked: "What happened?"

"It was around eleven in the evening, I think." Liliana's voice was 
barely 
more than a whisper but she forced herself to speak. "We had a little 
room 
in a house on the other side of the street, a little away from the bar. 
I 
was sleeping. Then suddenly there was this explosion. It was so loud, 
you 
can't imagine! So incredibly loud!" She stopped and seemed to brace 
herself. 
"I woke up and went to the window. The Sari Club was in a ball of fire. 
There were stones and ashes everywhere. And people screaming. I wanted 
to 
see my mother. So I ran down on the street. I burned my foot when I 
stepped 
on a hot piece of metal. Then there was another explosion, right in 
front of 
me. I saw... people... like swallowed by the fire. And..." Again she 
couldn't suppress her sobs. "Bodies and... and... a single arm," she 
whispered, terrified. "Then... there was this... this... I don't know 
the 
word." She looked up at Mac. "Like when the air knocks you down."

"The shock wave?" Mac helped her.

"Yeah. I fell and got hit by stones that flew around. There was fire 
everywhere. I got up and looked for my mom. Everywhere. But she wasn't 
there. I asked everyone. But no one knew her. I went home to see if she 
was 
there. But she wasn't. So I went down again. There was this musician 
who 
normally works in the bar. He saw me and... told me that... my 
mother... had 
died. I didn't want to believe him. I went on looking and then... under 
a 
piece of wall... there... there was... I saw..." the rest of her speech 
was 
once again lost to helpless sobbing.

Again Mac pulled her close, feeling her own tears threaten to fall. She 
looked up to Harm, desperately biting her lip and fighting to be strong 
for 
the girl. Then she buried her face in Liliana's soft hair.

Harm didn't know how to react. His first notion would have been to take 
both 
'his' girls in his arms but he felt he wasn't entitled to yet. So he 
just 
sat by, grieving for his friends and longing to do something.

"Go to her, Harm," Grandma Sarah whispered, "She needs you."

"I'd feel like an intruder," he replied just as low, his voice letting 
his 
pain show.

"To you she's already all the family you could ever wish for. Isn't 
that 
so?" she softly asked.

"Yeah," he admitted.

"Then go to her."

Giving his grandmother's hand a thankful squeeze, Harm stood and walked 
over 
to Mac and Liliana, quietly knelt down behind them and wrapped his arms 
around them, holding them tight. Immediately he felt Mac relax against 
his 
chest, suppressing a sob.

Then Liliana stirred. Releasing her somewhat from her tight embrace, 
Mac 
looked at the girl, silently begging her to go on with her narrative. 
Liliana glanced first at her, then at Harm, for a moment then squeezed 
her 
eyes shut and inhaled deeply. "I was like... in a daze. I went up home 
and 
cried all day. Then I slept. Very long. When I woke up it was night. I 
knew 
that I had to do something. My mother... couldn't look after me 
anymore, and 
I thought I had no one else. But then I thought of you, and I knew I 
had to 
go to you." She paused but Harm and Mac didn't ask her to go on. They 
sensed 
that the valve had been opened now, and she would spill everything that 
was 
on her mind.

"I took all the money I found and got on a bus to Gilimanuk. That's in 
the 
west of Bali. I often watched the big ships that go everywhere in the 
world. 
Some of them go to America and every time I saw them I thought of you, 
Mac."

Touched, Mac gently caressed the girl's cheek, eliciting the faintest 
of all 
smiles. Harm just stayed put, held on to his... family?... and tried to 
be 
as unobtrusive as possible.

"I knew they departed from Surabaya, that's in the east of Java. My... 
mother had told me once I asked her about it. So from Gilimanuk I took 
a 
boat to Banyuwangi, that's the town on the other side of the Bali 
Strait, on 
the island of Java. Then I took another bus to Surabaya. But then I had 
no 
money left for the ship. So I found out which one would go to America 
and, 
during the night, I snuck on board and hid in the cargo bay. That's how 
I 
came here." The girl involuntarily shivered, seemingly at the memories 
of 
her eight weeks journey.

Mac and Harm exchanged a look of surprise and admiration for the 
courage 
Liliana had once again proven to possess.

"You are the right person to bear that medal, Lily," Harm softly spoke 
up 
for the first time, smiling at the girl in Mac's arms.

Liliana looked at him with sad eyes. "My mommy is so far away and she 
will 
be buried there, on the other side of the world. I left her behind."

That one hit too close home. Harm suddenly felt his own tears rise 
fast. He 
still forced himself to answer. "My daddy is buried on the other side 
of the 
world, too," he whispered. "In Russia. I was there and I had to leave 
him 
behind. It's not our fault, Lily."

Instead of an answer, Liliana just stretched out her hand and carefully 
wiped away a tear that had escaped Harm's eye in spite of his efforts 
to 
suppress them. He smiled, again feeling incredibly shy. "Thank you," he 
only 
managed to whisper.

Grandma Sarah decided it was time to step in once again. Walking over 
to her 
children, she gently suggested: "Lily, don't you think you might want 
to go 
to bed now? Tomorrow we'll all go to church and pray for those of our 
family 
that aren't with us but watch us from above."

Liliana only nodded and allowed Harm to carry her upstairs to his old 
room 
where she slept. He himself used his grandfather's bed in the bedroom 
downstairs, leaving the guestroom for Mac.

Ten minutes later, Liliana had washed and donned her pajamas. Having 
bid 
goodnight to Gram, she motioned for Mac and Harm to sit at her bedside. 
"Can 
I make a Christmas wish?" she asked shyly.

"Of course," Mac answered with a smile.

"I want to stay with you." Liliana looked at them with big pleading 
eyes. 
"Both of you," she added quickly, to make sure they would understand.

Harm and Mac exchanged a somewhat uneasy smile. Harm took Liliana's 
little 
hand between his own. "It's not that easy, Lily," he carefully began.

"You don't want me?" Her eyes went huge with new fear. Harm could have 
slapped himself. 'Your communication skills again, Hammer,' he scolded 
himself.

Mac immediately embraced the girl. "Of course we want you, don't we, 
Harm?"

"We do, word of honor," Harm echoed.

Liliana's brow furrowed. "But you said..."

"... that it's not that easy, and that's true," Mac gently cut her off. 
"First we need to be sure that you have no living relatives in 
Indonesia."

The girl's face lit up. "I don't," she said eagerly. "My mother was 
an... an 
orphan. You can ask at St. Anne's Orphanage in Jakarta. That's where 
she 
grew up. She often told me about it."

The adults shared a quick hopeful smile. It was a start. Sobering, Mac 
went 
on. "Then we have to get the permission from the United States that you 
can 
stay here. And then they have to allow us to raise you. There are many 
others, you know, families, that take children and have far better 
chances 
than we do."

"But you are lawyers! You can convince them!"

Suppressing a chuckle, Harm brushed a strand of hair from Liliana's 
cheek. 
"We'll try with all our might. That's all we can promise you. Is that 
okay 
with you?"

She smiled at him. "Wonderful." A moment later she sobered. "Why did 
all 
this happen?"

"There's no way for us to know that, Lily," Harm answered, sighing. 
"There's 
a plan that's so much bigger than everything else on earth. We couldn't 
possibly comprehend. The most important thing is that you don't lose 
your 
faith."

"Then why did I feel so alone? Why has everyone left me?" Liliana 
asked, 
traces of through-gone desperation resurfacing.

"You were never alone, Lily," Mac spoke up, using that new warm voice 
that 
sent a shiver down Harm's spine. He looked at her and saw the sparkling 
in 
her beautiful dark eyes. 'God, don't let me screw it up this time,' he 
pleaded once again, unable to tear his eyes away from her.

"We're here now and knowing I existed made you go on," Mac explained. 
"And 
you have to know that, no matter what happened, God was always by your 
side. 
Listen," she intently looked at the girl, "I know a little story that 
my 
uncle once told me when I was feeling lost and let down by all the 
world. 
I'll tell it to you, if you like."

"Please, do," Liliana pleaded.

"Okay. Once upon a time, there was a man who knew that he had arrived 
at the 
end of the road that was his life. He stopped and turned around to look 
at 
what lay behind him. He saw that there were his footprints in the sand 
that 
covered his way. And there was another pair of footprints right beside 
his 
own that he knew were God's. But then he noticed that, at certain 
points of 
his life, there were only one person's tracks to be seen. So he turned 
and 
asked: 'Lord, if you are my protector and savior, why did you leave me 
alone 
at times when my life was particularly difficult?' But God answered: 'I 
didn't leave you. Those were the times that I carried you.'"

A far-away smile graced Liliana's face. "Wonderful..." she whispered.

"Keep that story in mind, Lily," Mac gently advised her, "It will help 
you 
through the rough times you'll have to face in your life. It helped me 
to 
face my demons."

"Then it will help me, too," she decided. "Good night, Mac."

"Good night, my little one." Mac bent down and softly kissed her on her 
forehead.

"Good night, Harm."

"Good night, Lily." Smiling, he blew her a kiss as they stood to leave 
the 
room.


Silently, Harm and Mac descended the stairs and sat down on the couch, 
finding a note from Grandma Sarah that she'd already gone to bed. 
Slowly the 
silence became intimidating. Clearing his throat self-consciously, Harm 
finally spoke up. "Mac?"

"Humm?"

"You know, regarding the INS, I think Lily's case has good chances. She 
suffered horrible things back home and saw her mother die. She seems to 
have 
no other relatives. Where she used to live before she might be 
persecuted 
for being a Christian. If anyone finds out that she saved all your 
lives 
when the US consulate in Aceh was under attack, she's sure to have new 
enemies trying to get to her. And she's a hero by American standards. 
It 
would surprise me very much if they sent her back to Indonesia."

Mac smiled thoughtfully. "Yeah... summing up all those facts, I think 
her 
chances of being admitted to the U.S. are fairly high."

"Do you remember that case I had to investigate about two years back, 
when 
the crew of the Stanley Dace picked up the Cuban refugee girl, Reynalda 
Mantilla?"

Mac nodded.

"I got to know someone from INS back then, Janet Vitagliano, who's been 
very 
fair and helpful to the case. I think she liked me." He grinned.

Mac only raised her eyebrows at him, smiling.

"Anyway, when Reynalda's case was being argued, I went to Florida to 
testify 
and before and after my testimony, Mrs. Vitagliano and I exchanged 
quite a 
few emails. I still have her phone number. I'm sure she'll be glad to 
help."

"Thanks, Harm," Mac replied quietly. "What would I do if it weren't for 
you?"

He smiled and averted his eyes, feeling himself blush a little. 
"Anytime, 
Sarah," he said softly.

Again the silence became palpable. Eventually Harm looked up and found 
Mac 
watching him. Trying to steady his breathing, he locked his gaze with 
hers. 
"You didn't answer my question, Mac."

Her voice was slightly hoarse when she answered. "You didn't answer 
mine."

"I asked first."

"But I can't answer first." Her eyes pleaded with him to understand her 
fear.

He felt less frightened than he had on the porch. After all, he had 
already 
confessed his feelings for Mac to his grandmother. The initial hurdle 
was 
taken. Harm even managed a slight smile when he answered. "I asked 
because 
of 'us'. I want to see your children - our children - grow up, Sarah. I 
want 
to be around. And I need you in my life." He held his breath. Now it 
was her 
turn.

The most beautiful smile he had ever seen lit up her face. She looked 
down 
for a moment, fighting her happy confusion, but then met his glance 
again, 
beaming radiantly from within. She reached up and tenderly caressed his 
temple with her fingertips. Her voice was very low when she spoke. 
"Then, 
instead of answering your question, let me ask you another one: Harmon 
Rabb, 
would you do me and Liliana the immense honor of being a permanent part 
of 
our little family-to-be?" Her voice shook almost imperceptibly.

Harm's smile widened to a full-blown one. But this wasn't his usual 
flyboy-grin. It was an outward reflection of what was going on inside 
his 
heart and mind. "Yeah, I would. Gladly," he added in a whisper, not 
trusting 
his voice. He caught her hand and softly placed a kiss on her palm, too 
moved to say anything else.

"Merry Christmas, Harm," she whispered.

"Merry Christmas, Sarah."

They sat in silence for a few endless minutes, trying to comprehend the 
enormity of their decision. Eventually Mac got up. "I think I'd better 
go to 
bed," she said, smiling.

"Me, too." He placed a hand at the small of her back and accompanied 
her to 
the stairs.

Mac stood on the first step and found herself at eyelevel with Harm. 
"What 
about work?" she asked anxiously, needing to know that it wouldn't be a 
threat to their happiness. Or she wouldn't be able to sleep.

Smiling, he smoothed her hair. "I suggest we talk to Chegwidden first 
thing 
when we get back. You know he'll find the best possible solution for 
us. And 
I'm willing to take anything he comes up with."

"So am I," she breathed, relieved beyond belief.

Slowly, simultaneously, they closed the distance and shared a 
passionate 
kiss, a warm, tender one this time, full of promises. When they parted 
for 
air, Harm again rested his forehead against hers, trying to steady 
himself.

"Do you want to come up?" Mac asked under her breath, feeling her 
stomach 
knot.

Harm met her glance, making Mac lose herself in his blue-green eyes 
that 
shone with emotion. "I'd love to," he whispered. "But..." he swallowed, 
briefly closing his eyes. "Sarah, this is the most wonderful thing that 
ever 
happened to me in my whole life," he confessed, still whispering. "And 
I am 
scared like hell I could screw it up just because we're rushing 
things."

"Okay," she gently consented, kissing him once again. "So I have 
something 
to look forward to."

He chuckled slightly. "So do I." With his index finger he traced her 
lips, 
smiling. "Good night, Sarah. I love you."

Mac's breath caught in her throat. Pulling him into a tight hug, she 
buried 
her face in the curve of his neck. "I love you, too, Harm."

Sharing one last look of mutual feeling, they parted and went to sleep 
in 
the elated awareness that they had finally crossed the bridge and found 
each 
other.



Dec. 25th, 2002
1401 ZULU
Rabb Farm
Outside Beallsville, PA



After a long, happy night's rest, the foursome had gathered around the 
kitchen table for breakfast. There were no presents under the tree yet. 
They 
all felt they had more important things in mind right now and could 
still 
get into tradition later that day. Outside the sky was of a dizzying 
turquoise blue and the bright sun made the fresh snow sparkle that had 
fallen over night. Grandma Sarah had baked a Christmas cake and had cut 
thick slices for everyone. The perfume of fresh coffee filled the room. 
All 
were quietly enjoying the serene atmosphere.

When everyone was finished, Harm exchanged a smile with Mac and spoke 
up. 
"Uhm... Liliana, you remember that Christmas wish you made yesterday?"

The girl nodded, hope shining in her eyes.

"Well, Mac and I talked about it after you went to sleep. And we made a 
few 
decisions. First," he cleared his throat and cast his grandmother a 
meaningful glance, "Mac and I decided that life is even more beautiful 
if 
you share it with someone you love." He lovingly looked at Mac and took 
her 
hand. She smiled back in kind.

Grandma Sarah gasped. But then a smile spread over her face. "Harmon, I 
knew 
I could trust you to do the right thing. Now, that's great news! Sarah, 
welcome to our family then... or... am I running away with my 
conclusions 
here?"

Mac grinned embarrassedly. "Well, we weren't really explicit on the 
point 
yet, but, considering our plans, I think things are more or less 
settled." 
Hoping that Harm wouldn't notice, Mac admitted to herself that she'd 
sounded 
far more secure than she felt.

Feeling her hand tremble, he tightened his grip. "I may need a few days 
to 
adjust to the 180-degree-turn that my life just took," Harm admitted 
sheepishly. "But, generally speaking, your conclusions were right, 
Gram. 
Mac," he turned to her, "Welcome to our family."

"Does that mean you're together now?" Liliana exclaimed, excited.

"Yes, it does," Mac answered happily, still marveling at the thought.

"Wonderful! What made you talk?"

"You, Lily," Mac laughed. Then she earnestly looked at the girl. "Do 
you 
still want to live with Harm and me?"

Liliana nodded, holding her breath.

"Well, we promised we would try everything we could. We can't tell you 
anything else now, but I think we can safely say that the odds are 
pretty 
good that your wish will come true."

Liliana just looked from one to the other and back a few times, 
seemingly 
not daring to believe that her nightmare would have a happy ending 
after 
all. "Thank you," was all she whispered in awe.

"Okay," Grandma Sarah got up, hands at her hips, "Off with you to 
church 
now. I'll stay back and prepare the turkey."

"But Gram, we couldn't possibly..." Mac started to protest but was 
immediately cut off by the resolute woman.

"Nonsense. You need to start practicing being a family. So take the 
opportunity. I'll have a little talk with God by myself up here." 
Grandma 
Sarah grinned. "Besides, the fresh snow is way to deep for me to walk 
easily 
and no way are you going to miss the little hike on a day like this, 
just 
because of my legs."

"Better not upset the Commanding Grandmother, Mac," Harm admonished, 
laughing. "Once she's made up her mind, take it as if it were one of 
Chegwidden's orders."

"I see," Mac chuckled, buttoning up her jacket.

When they were ready to go, Grandma Sarah hugged each of them tightly. 
Embracing her grandson, she swallowed. "Your father would be proud of 
you," 
she whispered. Harm acknowledged with a tight squeeze he gave her. He'd 
rather not speak right now.


They had to walk downhill for more or less half an hour to reach 
Beallsville 
church. It was freezing cold and the air pricked where it came into 
contact 
with the skin. The scenery was breathtaking. After they had stepped out 
of 
the woods surrounding the Rabb farm, they could see the whole valley. 
Everything was deeply snowed in and the virgin snow sparkled in the 
bright 
sunlight.

All the time Harm held his arm firmly wrapped around Mac, reveling in 
the 
feeling of finally having her close to him. Liliana was quietly walking 
at 
their side, holding on to Mac's hand. The world lay in deep silence, 
the 
distant tolling of the church bells and the crunching of their steps in 
the 
snow being the only noises perceptible. None of them felt inclined to 
speak 
and disturb the perfect peace.

At one point, Liliana turned and looked back up to where they had come 
from. 
"Mac," she said softly, stopping.

"What?"

"Look. There are our footprints in the snow."

Mac and Harm turned and looked at three furrows that their steps had 
ploughed into the deep virgin snow, evenly accompanying one another, 
never 
wavering.

"Is this how it's going to be?" Liliana asked in almost a whisper.

Harm exchanged a loving glance with Mac and then smiled at the girl. 
"Yes, 
for all that we can possibly do about it. And if, one day, that 
shouldn't be 
enough, one of us will always be there to carry you."

With that, he swept the little girl up in his arms and made her sit on 
his 
shoulders. Then he extended a hand to Mac and they continued their 
walk, for 
the first time in their lives entirely at peace with the world that 
surrounded them.



THE END