Title: The Future
Author: Nimue - nimue47@gmx.net

May 10th, 2002

Disclaimer: I don't own them.... Bellisarius Productions, Paramount and 
CBS do... No infringement intended.
Summary: JAG fanfic No. 3. Harm and Mac babysit. [H/M]

Rating: PG-13  

Author's Note: Thanks to Elke and Sylvia for all their help! And thanks 
to Nieke for the beta!

 ~*~

Harmon Rabb leaned back against the couch he was sitting on, watching 
the scene in front of him. He couldn't help the smile that crept onto 
his face. It seemed so natural to have her sitting near him, and it 
seemed so easy to imagine that she was feeding their child instead of little 
AJ Roberts. Kate Pike's visit a few days ago really had gotten him to 
reconsider his life and the decisions he had made, or chose not to make. 
But he didn't want to think about that, for at that moment he could 
pretend that everything was all right. In this perfect world there was no 
Mic Brumby or Renee Peterson. In this perfect world there was just him 
and Mac, regardless of what the ring on Mac's hand indicated. 

 

"What?" She asked, shifting little AJ from one knee to the other before 
lifting a spoon to his mouth. She waved it in front of his face, making 
little motor noises and asking for permission to land. 

 

"What what?" Harm grinned, making funny faces at the toddler who turned 
into a giggling something. Squealing around, he made it impossible for 
Mac to hit her goal. Before she could get the spoon out of his reach, 
AJ hit it, causing the pap to fly around. It landed on top of one of the 
files Harm and Mac had been working on earlier, before Bud and Harriet 
had dropped the little guy off. 

 

"See what you did?" She glared at Harm, rubbing a tissue over the 
paper, trying her best to get rid of the stain without destroying the file. 
The toddler used this opportunity to snatch the spoon from her other 
hand and rub it over her uniform top, effectively cleaning it that way. 
"Oh no, bad AJ," she scolded him, immediately retrieving it from his 
hands. 

 

Immediately his hands snaked forward. "Mine," he stated fiercely. 
Starting to wail, he stretched his hand towards the spoon. "I want. Mine!" 
He insisted, tears beginning to form in his eyes.

 

"AJ, honey, this is not yours," Mac cooed gently. Trying to distract 
him by handing him the toy-Tomcat - a present from Harm. Soon the toddler 
had forgotten all about the spoon and was happily humming away. 

 

Mac looked down at herself, trying to get an idea of the damage the 
little boy had done. Looking up, she noticed that Harm was desperate to 
stop himself from bursting out. Glaring at him, she growled: "You better 
wipe that grin off your face, mister. This is not funny."

 

"Awe, come on, Mac. It is. You have to give me that." He tried to give 
her his best flyboy grin, the one that usually got him everything he 
wanted. But it hardly worked with Mac.


She sighed, adverting her eyes to look at the boy who was smiling at 
her innocently. "I am just no good with toddlers, Harm. I can't help it. 
I haven't been around them for a long time. Back then I was one myself, 
you know. So that doesn't really count." 

 

Harm scooted closer, his hand lifting her head. Looking into her eyes, 
he stated firmly: "Mac, you're wonderful with AJ, regardless of the pap 
covering you. That happens to the best. And I know that you will be a 
wonderful mother to our baby one day."  Harm smiled as her eyes widened 
in shock. 


"What?" Mac managed to choke out, her face a little pale all of a 
sudden.


"What?" Harm challenged her. What was so bad in telling her that she 
was wonderful with AJ? 

 

"You think about stuff like that?" Mac's face turned from pale to 
crimson, as she realized where this talk might actually be heading.

 

"Stuff like what?" He asked, completely clueless to what she meant. 
When it hit him, he paled. Had he actually said the *our baby* part out 
loud? If Mac's shocked face was any indication, he had. He voiced his 
suspicion, "Did I actually say that?"

 

She nodded, unable to do anything else. 

He gulped as her eyes sought his. They were shining with hope and 
something else he didn't dare to place. He decided that now was as good a 
time as ever to voice his dreams. He took a deep breath. "Yeah, I've 
thought about it. Actually, I think we're going to have at least two 
babies."

 

"Two babies?" Mac asked, feeding AJ some more, who was listening 
closely to what was being said, behaving for once. She was willing to do 
about anything to distract herself from Harm. When had this conversation 
turned so very personal? Why did she have a conversation with her best 
friend when there was a fiancé she had never once touched this subject 
with? Why was this the second time she and Harm talked about it? The 
answer was pretty easy, yet hard to stomach. Harm interrupted her line of 
thought by responding.

 

"You know, a girl and a boy. One with my brains and your looks, one 
with your brains and my looks," Harm smiled, remembering the conversation 
that had taken place about 18 months ago. How could he ever forget it? 
It was before Brumby, before Renee. Back when life had been a lot 
nicer. 

 

"And when is that going to happen?" She challenged. She wasn't sure 
whether or not she wanted the answer to this question. Here she was 
sitting, having promised another man to marry him not long ago, hoping - for 
what exactly? Was she hoping Harm would tell her *let's go for it now, 
Mac*? How could she have such a discussion with him when she had just 
agreed to build a life with Mic? How was that possible?

 

"I don't know. 5 years. We gave each other five years, didn't we?" Harm 
smiled, not noticing the turmoil that went on in Mac, who was bent over 
AJ to avoid looking into his eyes.

 

Mac had to smile at that. "We did. And what are we going to do until 
then?" Did she just say that? Who was she kidding? If Harm really wanted 
her, she would give Brumby that ring of his back as soon as humanly 
possible to replace it with Harm's. She noticed with a start that she 
wouldn't marry Mic Brumby. Whatever else would happen, she would not be 
able to marry Mic after what had just happened. She almost missed his 
reply. 


"Well, how about getting that little guy here to bed?" Harm smiled, 
teasing a little. Was she really willing to give them a chance? What about 
Mic? Harm noticed that he didn't even bother to give Renee a second 
thought. Their relationship, or lack thereof, was over. Had never really 
existed for him. If Mac wanted him or not, he would have to end it as 
soon as possible. 

 

AJ's head snapped up at that. He was about to protest, but then, when 
Mac didn't make any indication of moving, decided not to remind them of 
his presence.

 

"That takes up to about 30 minutes. Try again." Mac grinned, finally 
looking up to meet his eyes. Silently, she was wondering if she was ready 
for this conversation. Both of them were in a more or less serious 
relationship with others. Was this the time to start something new? 
Together? There couldn't be any time worse than that, could there? She had to 
admit that now was as good as a time as any other, the only less 
fitting she could think of was her - or his - engagement party. Or their 
respective weddings. She had to smile at that. Wasn't it the most romantic 
scenario of all? The knight in shining armor, or dress whites, coming 
into a church to rescue her from the worst mistake of her life? Worst 
mistake of her life? Was that what Mic was for her? She sighed. Yes, it 
all came down to this. Mic wasn't the one she loved. He was the one who 
offered her all she had ever wanted. He loved her, he had given up 
everything for her and, most importantly, he was always there for her. She 
craved the security he gave her. 

 

"A penny for your thoughts, Marine," Harm stated, searching her eyes 
for any indication of what she had been thinking. He could see the 
turmoilt inside of her and her indecision. 

 

"Harm. It's so difficult. Why now?" She sighed, resting her hand on 
his, the toddler who eyed the scene unfold with his big orbs seemingly 
forgotten. 

 

"I don't know, Mac," he said. "I really don't know. Maybe it is because 
today is as good a time as any other. Maybe it is because I don't want 
to wait until things with Mic go any further than they already have. I 
don't want to lose you. Ever."

 

"You won't lose me, Harm, whatever will happen, you won't. I promise." 
She tried to stress her point by squeezing his hand reassuringly. 

 

"Then why do I feel that I already have? I know that our friendship is 
kind of back on track, but there is so much missing. I miss our dinners 
together, those who didn't have anything to do with work. I just want 
want you back in my life. I want to spend lazy afternoons with you on 
the couch watching a sappy movie, I want our morning runs back, I want so 
much more than that, but it wouldn't be right. Not anymore. You belong 
to someone else now. All this isn't my prerogative, it's his now." He 
sighed. "I have lost you to him, Mac. I will have to cope with it."

 

"Harm, when has this conversation turned so gloomy?"

 

He shrugged, averting his eyes to stare at AJ, who sat snuggled into 
her embrace. What would he give for being in that position now? He 
couldn't believe where his thoughts kept running. How could he still dream 
about her, when she was spoken for another? 

 

"Look at me, Harm. Please, look at me." She knew she sounded as if she 
was begging, and maybe she was. 

 

"Harm, just imagine it was just us two. No Renee, no Mic, what are we 
going to do until the time for our baby promise is there?"

 

He smiled, looking deeply into her eyes. Somehow he found himself 
hovering inches away from her head. He could feel her warm breath on his 
lips. He wanted her to realize that everything he was about to say came 
from deep within his heart, wanted her to believe that he was nothing but 
honest to her. "I would plan on filling the stomach of my unsatiable 
Marine every day to come, I would plan on kissing her senseless, I would 
plan on practising a lot when it comes to the baby production and then 
I would plan to make her my wife and buy a house we would fill with 
those little Rabbs and MacKenzies."

 

Her breath stuck in her throat, as she stared at him, her mouth wide 
agape in shock. Only when her lungs screamed at her to breathe, did she 
do so. With every bit of air that filled her lungs, she was able to 
stomach a little more of what he had said. It felt so right, so very much 
like the dream she had always had about them being together. "And does 
*your* Marine know about all that?" She finally managed to breathe. 

 

"Well, I just told her and I hope she will keep me. Not that I should 
get my hopes high. You know, she's engaged, and I am in a relationship 
as well, at least for now. Not that I still plan to be in that one 
tomorrow."

 

"Shut up, Harm," Mac smiled. "Just stop babbling."

 

"Okay, I think I can do that," he mentally kicked himself for 
mentioning his plans to ditch Renee and why the heck did he have to mention 
Brumby again?

 

"Harm, it's tempting, very tempting. The picture you painted seems so 
perfect," Mac pulled her bottom lip into her mouth, regarding him. She 
pretended to be deep in thought considering his words carefully. But 
deep within herself she knew that she would end things with Mic the next 
day at latest. She couldn't live with this lie anymore. Especially since 
the stubborn sailor in front of him finally had gotten something right 
and had managed to tell her.

 

Noticing that his 'sitters were still both very occupied, AJ found that 
watching them was getting boring and used the opportunity to get hold 
of the spoon again. Neither of them noticed his attempts to paint 
patterns on both their uniforms while they were deeply entranced by one 
another and with their respective whirling minds. 

 

"So Harm, if I am agreeing to this, I will find myself being fed by 
you, having you as my husband and having at least two kids. Do you also 
know what our children's names are going to be?" Mac smiled, deciding to 
go for her chance at happiness.

 

"Well, we can always think about that later, but what do you think 
about Anna or Emily for a girl? I read a book not long ago and I thought 
those two were kinda cute," Harm smiled a brilliant genuine smile that 
made her heart flutter uncontrollably. If she had thought his flyboy 
smile was bad, this one was definitely worse. 

 

"What was the name of that book, Harm?" Mac teased, trying her best to 
get the spoon back from little AJ. 

 

"Well, something about *Kid's Names*", he grinned. 

 

"Harm, you don't cease to amaze me. How long have you been fantasizing 
about this?" Mac asked, once again shocked.

 

"Well, to be honest. Quite some time. But the moment Harriet announced 
she was pregnant really got me going." 

 

Mac shook her head in disbelief. If he had known that long ago, why 
hadn't he said anything? What was so hard about telling her about it back 
then? He could have prevented all the Brumby mess back then.

 

"So, what're you saying, Mac? Will you keep me?" His voice was 
unsteady. 

 

Mac regarded him once again. His eyes begged for her not to break his 
heart, not to reject him. There was so much hope in them, so much fear 
for rejection. She smiled at him reassurently. "Was that ever the 
question? Of course I will. I have some errands to run first, though."

 

He smiled broadly, closing the remaining distance between them. She 
gasped when his lips brushed against hers, nibbling gently. He pulled back 
after a few moments, glancing at AJ. "You're not going to spill this to 
anyone, mister. That's an order."

 

The toddler crooked his head to one side, then stiffled a yawn. 

 

"It's bed for you, AJ." Harm smiled. Taking him into his arms. Leaning 
down to kiss her tenderly, he whispered: "Be right back," then made his 
way to the bathroom, while Mac busied herself trying to clean up the 
mess AJ had created. 

 

She smiled to herself, as she heard him scolding the boy for the mess 
he had made out of his own clothes and Harm's. Then the water running 
into the bathtub drowned the voice out. Obviously Harm had decided that 
there was only one way to get AJ cleaned up. 


When Mac gathered the files they had been working on, and put them into 
her briefcase, her gaze drifted to the engagement ring that still 
rested on her finger. Mic's ring. Giving it back to him would prove to be 
ugly, she was sure about that. There would be no way to do it gently, 
without hurting him. He would know immediately that she had chosen Rabb 
instead of him. Heavens knew that he accused her of cheating on him with 
Rabb often enough. Somehow he seemed to have always feared that this 
would one day be the case. She had to give Mic that he had seen love 
where Harm and her both hadn't. Until now. She slipped the ring off her 
finger, letting it slide into her purse. Tomorrow. Tomorrow she would end 
things with Mic.   

 

"I am sorry," his voice startled her out of her reverie. 

 

"Sorry for what, Harm?" She gazed up to see him cradling a very wet AJ 
to his chest. 

 

"Sorry for not coming to my senses earlier," he added.

 

She smiled at him. "I am glad you did at all." She looked him up and 
down. "Did you get into the tub with AJ?" she teased.

 

"He just decided he liked splashing a lot. And before I knew it, I was 
soaked, now I guess I have to dry the two of us and get this devil into 
bed."

 

"Devil," AJ repeated with a wicked smile. 

 

"Have fun you two," she smiled, as he went back into the bathroom. 

 

Before he disappeared, she called out to him. When he turned, she blew 
him a kiss and whispered, "Love you."

 

Grinning, he nodded. "Yeah, me too, wife. But I need to get us dried 
before we catch a cold." 

 

"Wife?" she gasped. 

 

"Still working on that part, but I won't have it any other way, Mac. 
That is if you'll have me." 

 

"Neither would I," she whispered after he had left the room. 



The End.


Feedback always welcome! ~Kat