Title: Endings IV/ The Joke
Author: Jagman and Catlady
Summery: Harm and Mac talk and it doesn't come out
right. Once again Captain Buro. And Lieutenant
Commander Russo are main characters, You shippers
won't like this story(ducking from objects being
thrown lol) time line is this year. but no Commander
Russo in Iraq story line. Continuation Little part
about Catherine Bell, made up a different name for her
Jag Character. Don't laugh Catlady is the real
Commander Catherine Russo, my future fiancee
Feedback: welcomed  both  positive  and negative just
don't be mean or insulting Biochemexpert@aol.com 
Rating: NC-17 for sexy talk and images.

Endings IV/ The Joke



0900 hrs
April 14th 2003
Jag Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia
Mac sashayed into the bullpen with a wiggle in her
walk, her six swayed back and forth provocatively. She
went into the coffee room and saw Commander Sturgis
Turner pouring a cup of coffee, when he saw Mac he
said, "Morning Mac", Mac walked over to him and said
cheerfully, "Morning Sturgy, how are you this morning
sexy". Sturgis' eyes opened up wide and his mouth
opened in shock. "Uh Colonel, red light please". Mac
looked at him and smiled. "Oh come on Sturgy just
being friendly here no need to worry", she said as she
reached out and stroked Sturgis' cheek. He grabbed his
coffee and ran out of the room to his office.  Mac Got
herself a cup of coffee and reentered the bullpen
where she saw Lieutenant Roberts. She went over to him
and patted him on the back, "Good morning Buddy, how
are you this morning handsome?"Bud just looked at her
and smiled. "Uh fine colonel, and you?" "Marvelous
Buddy, simply marvelous", Mac said. After exchanging
some more pleasantries Mac headed for her office
swinging her hips. As she walked away she looked over
her shoulder and saw Bud staring with a gapping mouth.
 She Entered her office threw her briefcase down and
burst out laughing. She dived into some files .to make
the morning go faster, Catherine had a meeting and
would be in later so Mac worked alone.
At the same time Admiral Chegwidden was sitting in his
office chuckling to himself. "This is going to be
good", he thought to himself, "I can't wait to see
Rabb's face". Now it was time for the morning staff
meeting and every one was in the conference room., Mac
handed out cases to Sturgis and Harm, and Bud and
Lieutenant Singer. Mac's lips were Twitching when she
handed Harm his file. He looked at her but she would
not let her eyes meet his.
After the meeting they returned to their respected
offices, The Admiral sat in his as he anticipated the
coming event. He read file after file lost in his work
until he looked at his watch and saw it was nearing
1200. "Show time", he said with a grin. He left his
office and entered the bullpen. "Attention on deck",
someone cried out/ "At ease", he said. In the middle
of the bullpen Bud, Harrier, and Sturgis were chatting
over some photos of little AJ Harriet was showing.
"Good", the admiral said to himself, "an audience". He
walked over to the three officers and started
chatting. A moment later Mac came out of her office
and walked towards Harm's. At the same time Catherine
entered the bullpen and joined the little group. 
Mac stood outside Harm's door and knocked "Enter" she
heard. She pulled down her uniform jacket and said to
herself, "here goes", She entered Harm's office and
with a seductive smile said, "Hi Harmie warmie", Harm
mouthed to himself, "Harmie warmie?". Mac sat on the
edge of his desk and pulled her skirt up a little,
Harm had a shocked look on his face. "Mac cut that
out", he said. "What's the matter flyboy not in the
mood for a show".  She then stood up and put her hands
on her breasts. "What do you think of these sailor?"
she said squeezing her breasts, "Mac your crazy.
What's gotten into you. You better stop it now", Harm
said. "It's not a question of what's gotten into me,
more like what I want in me" she said as she hiked up
her skirt exposing her stocking tops. Meanwhile out in
the bullpen Admiral Chegwidden was trying to contain
his laughter, because Mac left up all the blinds in
Harm's office. As AJ was trying hard not to laugh,
Catherine snorted and Sturgis shot her a look. "Sorry
sir", she said. "Sinuses". Now Mac walked closer to
Harm and he backed away. "What's the matter Hormone,
afraid of lil ole me?". Mac then turned around and
bent down and pulled her skirt up revealing a black
thong. She then reached her hand up between her legs
and placed a finger on her crotch. Harm's eyes hit the
floor. "Colonel enough", he said, "If the admiral sees
you he'll have you up on charges and also ask for a
mental evaluation". Out side the officers were in
shock, Sturgis turned to the admiral and said, "sir
you see what's going on?" "Oh yeah", he said trying
not to laugh. Catherine snorted again and Sturgis
looked at her. "Commander, could you do that some
place else please?". "Sorry sir, I'll go over there",
she said pointing to the copy machine.
Mac was still bent over but know she was slapping her
six lightly. "Wanna take this for a ride flyboy, but I
think it will be a some what tighter fit then a tomcat
cockpit". .Mac said. Out in the bullpen, Bud, Harriet,
and Sturgis were awestruck. They could not believe the
scene unfolding before them in Harm's office. Mac was
still slapping her six and saying, "come on flyboy
ride me baby". Harm had just about enough, he grabbed
Mac by the shoulders. "Come on Mac snap out of it your
really going to get in trouble". Mac just laughed and
started unbuttoning her uniform jacket. "Hey squid
wanna see my boobies" she said.. At this point the
three officers, Bud, Harriet and Sturgis just didn't
know what to expect next. Finally, Sturgis Turned to
the admiral and with a questioning look asked, "sir
aren't you going to intercede, I mean the colonel is
really not herself this morning". With that the
admiral lost it he burst out laughing, and Catherine
who was sitting with one butt cheek on the copy
machine snorted and fell on her six in hysterical
laughter. Bud ran over and helped her back on her
feet, she was laughing uncontrollably. Sturgis looked
at her. "You find this amusing commander?". "Yes I do
sir, the admiral seems to think so too", she laughed.
Back in Harm's office Mac was pouring it on. wiggling
her six and unbuttoning her blouse now. Her breasts
were almost popping out of her black bra. "Hey Harmie,
come closer, stick your head in between them". She
said. Harm was getting angry now, he felt that Mac was
making a fool of him in front of everyone, and this
was certainly conduct unbecoming an officer of her
stature. "Ok Mac enough is enough you've totally gone
over the edge stop it right now".he said. "Oh lighten
up Hormone, I'm not going to bite you, not yet
anyway". Sturgis couldn't take it anymore, he looked
the admiral in his eye and said, "sir if you don't put
a stop to this right now I will". "Hold your ground
commander", AJ said. "I'll decide when it's over, or
the colonel will". Sturgis just rolled his eyes, and
looked at Catherine who was snorting with tears
rolling down her cheeks.
Finally Mac slowed down she buttoned up her blouse and
jacket and headed for the door .She bent over one last
time and hiked up her skirt and slapped her six again.
"One last look at what your never going to have
Hormone", she said as she massaged the crotch of her
thong one last time and walked out the door. She
headed for the group in the middle of the bullpen, and
winked at AJ, and Catherine. "Hey guys", she said.
"You guys look like Catherine Bell just walked in here
nude", she laughed. "What's up" Catherine snorted at
that line thinking of what was up in Harm's  pants.
Sturgis raised his voice and directed his attention
towards Catherine. "Commander if you do that one more
time I'm going to shove paper towels up your nose. Now
please cease and desist". Catherine tried to look at
him with a straight face. "Aye, aye sir", she said.
With that Mac said, "well me and Cath have a lunch
date see you all later" As she passed Bud she slapped
him on his six. Harriet's mouth flew open but nothing
came out. The admiral said, "colonel, commander, enjoy
your lunch. Lieutenants, commander my office now.
Once in his office, AJ motioned the three officers to
sit. He sat behind his desk for a good ten minutes
laughing hysterically. After he finally stopped he
just sat there. Sturgis broke the ice. "Sir I just
can't believe you let that all unfold like that.
Clearly there is something seriously wrong with
Colonel MacKenzie, she was just not herself, I mean
she was acting like, like a", "slut", Harriet broke
in. AJ looked at his junior office. "Lieutenant Sims
that was uncalled for". "Sorry sir, I could not find a
more nicer way to put it". AJ laughed some more before
finally saying, "Sturgis you don't know how right you
were when you stated that the colonel was not
herself", he said chuckling. "Sir?". Sturgis said,
"That was not Colonel MacKenzie". "It wasn't?. Then
who was it" Bud said. AJ replied. "That was Commander
Russo", AJ smiled. "Then who was Commander Russo",
Harriet said. "Obviously, that was the colonel", Bud
replied. "Give the man a cigar", the admiral said, and
explained. "You see, Harm has been treating Mac kind
of mean lately. He said some horrible things about her
and Commander Russo. So Cath devised this little joke
to play on Rabb. They switched roles. You know Mac
could never do the things that Cath did in there. Cath
is a bit more uh" "loose" Sturgis finished for him.
"No commander she's more confident where her body is
concerned. She wanted to teach Rabb a lesson, and by
the way I don't want anyone to think any less about
Cath. She's an exceptional officer and a good friend
to help Mac like this.. Oh by the way that was only
part one of the joke", AJ said. "After lunch they're
going to switch back into their own uniforms and Mac
will act like this morning never happened. That'll
rattle Rabb's brain" After it all had sunken in,
Sturgis had to laugh."Did you see the look on his face
when Commander Russo bent over". With that they all
laughed.
1400 hrs
April 14th 2003
Jag Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia.
Mac and Catherine returned from lunch wearing their
own uniforms now. They entered the bullpen and
everyone was staring at Mac, the word had gotten
around, but she didn't care. She knew it wasn't her
doing those things and at this point she didn't care
what people thought. She actually like it that
everyone thought she was kind of risque. The two
friends walked to the coffee room and who was in
there. None other then Harm. Catherine gave him a big
smile and said, "Hi Harm how's it hanging". Mac
snorted to stifle a laugh. Harm motioned with his head
to Catherine "Uh I had to much coffee I have to go to
the head", and she walked out. Harm looked at Mac and
said, "what the hell was that before?". "What was
what?" Mac said. "you know what I'm talking about".
"No I don't commander do you?", Mac said. "You know
what I'm talking about. That little slut act in my
office". Mac snorted again but she had to play along.
She gave him her best marine glare. "Commander Rabb, I
have no idea what the hell your talking about. And
please refrain from calling me names, I'm not one of
your one night stands".she said,. Harm rolled his
eyes. "Give it a break Mac, you were in there lifting
your skirt, touching your breasts and other things no
respectable officer would do". "Commander", Mac said.
"Either you fell asleep at your desk and were
dreaming, or you've been spending to much time on
carriers sniffing aviation fuel. I did no such thing
and never would". "Mac" Harm said, you didn't do those
things yeah right", Harm said. "I think you've finally
gone off the deep end, you've lost it". Mac was trying
not to laugh. "If only you knew Rabb", she thought to
herself. "I'm not talking about this any more Harm, if
anyone has lost it, it is you. Lifting my skirt,
touching myself in a provocative way, me?, never.
Maybe that's what you'd like to see, but that won't
happen. So drop it Commander". "Mac", Harm said.
"We're not through with this conversation, not by a
long shot" "Well anymore conversations will be with
yourself, because I refuse to speak of it anymore".
She turned to leave but Harm grabbed her arm and spun
her around. "Just who do you think you are MacKenzie,
playing games like that". Mac kicked Harm in the shin
hard, he grimaced and bent down to rub it."I told you
if you touched me again you'd be sorry Rabb". Mac
started to walk out and Harm yelled after her. "We're
not through yet MacKenzie". She flipped him the bird
and walked out.
Mac walked into her office and Catherine was waiting
for her. They both looked at each other and burst out
laughing. "How did it go", Catherine asked. "It went
well, but I got a little carried away and I kicked
him". "Hard?", Catherine asked. "Yeah pretty hard".
"Oh well", Catherine said. "Maybe he'll think now
before he opens that big mouth of his. I just wish Al
was here to see the show he would have gotten a kick
out of it".
1600 hrs
April 14th 2003
Jag Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia
Catherine left early, she had twisted her back working
out the night before and she had a doctor's
appointment. Mac decided to work late, so she went
through the thirty or so files in her in box. She
noticed that the lights were still on in Harm's
office. "Damn she thought, he's not going to let this
go tonight". She thought it would be best to tell him
about the joke, so if he confronted her she would tell
him. At about 1900, she decided to head for home. She
packed her stuff up, turned off her computer and
lights and walked out. Right on cue as Harm heard her
footsteps he raced out of his office. He cornered her
and threw up his hands. "Mac, truce. I have a dinner
date with Meg so I don't have much time. Please tell
me what's going on?" Mac broke down and laughed. "Oh
you think this is funny?". She looked him in the eyes
and snorted to control her laughter. "Oh Harmon Rabb",
She said. "That was Cath this morning", she said with
tears of laughter streaming down her face. "What?",
Harm said. "I said that was Cath, it was her idea. She
wanted to get you back for saying those horrible
things about us".Once it sunk in Harm joined Mac's
laughter. He pointed a finger at her. "You two are
really good. I thought it was you. Holy crap, I should
have known you could never do those things. Damn she
should get an Academy Award for best actress", Harm
said laughing. "Remind me to never get her really mad
at me". "I will", Mac replied. Harm stuck out his had.
"Friends?", Mac took his hand. "Friends, and sorry I
kicked you. And all the best to you and Meg, I mean
that Harm. You really like her huh?'. Harm looked into
Mac's eyes. "Yes I do. I guess I have for a long time,
guess that's why I couldn't let go. Sorry Mac"."Well I
guess this is it huh Harm?" Mac said. Yeah it is Mac,
but you'll always be my friend. And I wish you all the
luck in any relationship you enter into. You'll do
fine Mac, and you stick with Cath and I'm sure she'll
teach you how to be a real lady. What I mean is she'll
find you some one that will love and cherish you Mac,
she's a good judge of character, Al's a lucky guy".
Mac looked at Harm. "Yes he is and so are we because
she's now our friend too", Mac said, "You two seem to
get a long well". "Yes we do, she's the sister I never
had, and I'm the sister she lost". "Lost?". Harm
said,. Mac replied. "Yes her and her sister don't
talk, it's not my place to tell you, but maybe someday
when all this ruckus has settles down, maybe we can
all get together for a nice evening of friendly talk.
I love her dearly Harm we're connected I don't know if
it's because we look so much alike or what, but the
three of us get along so well". "I can see that", Harm
said, "and I'm sorry I said those horrible things
about you both. I deserved that kick". Harm looked at
his watch, "got to run Mac I'm late". "As usual" Mac
said. Harm smiled and turned to leave, and said. "I'm
looking forward to all of us getting together, I know
Meg will love it"
Things were getting better for Lieutenant Colonel
Sarah MacKenzie. She had gotten a lot off her chest
these past weeks. She confronted Harm on their
relationship, she did battle with him, and after the
joke she had played on him with Catherine, she made
him feel like a fool. That part she regretted, but not
the rest. Now she could get on with her life. She
would be happy. Harm was right, Catherine would help
her find the right man that would make her dreams come
true. Catherine was so outgoing and confident, and she
had mentioned that there were a few nice guys who
worked with Catherine at Bethesda. Lonely men who just
wanted someone to love. Yes Sarah MacKenzie would be
just fine, her sister would see to it.
The End
Next A new Life I/ The Fix up